log in | register >> Start here

Your Avatar
hide show

To create your own timeline, log in or join now:

great baby registries

Find a couple's baby registry. Enter parents' name here.

Create your own baby registry here.

Personalized Tee and Tutu Set

$29.95 set

$18.99 set

Buy Now

Piggy Bank

$13.95 each

$6.99 each

Buy Now

you asked...

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

How can I avoid tearing during delivery?

Re: How can I avoid tearing during delivery?

The Bump Expert

Sorry, but there’s no surefire way to prevent tears in the skin surrounding your vagina during delivery. (Yes, ouch.) But, some studies do show that regular perineal massage during the final six weeks can reduce your risk. This technique gently stretches the vaginal opening, making it more elastic and better able to fit around baby's noggin.

To perform the massage yourself, wash your hands and lube up your fingers with KY jelly, vegetable oil or vitamin E. Sit on your bed or on the floor with your knees bent and your legs slightly spread. Place your thumbs three to four centimeters inside your vagina, with the pads of your thumbs pressing on the bottom. Use your thumbs to stretch the vaginal opening downward and to the sides, and hold until it stings slightly. Then gently but firmly massage the bottom half of the vagina, and place a thumb inside and pull outward on the lower rim. Repeat twice a day, and feel free to ask your partner for help! Remember, though: Despite some studies that show that women who massage have fewer tears, many OBs believe it helps very little (or not at all).

Paula Kashtan | May 08 , 2009 4:52 PM

re: Q: Tears During Delivery?

Pushing only when you're told?!? WFT? They DON'T KNOW WHEN YOU SHOULD PUSH!! You should try to be in as upright position as possible. Occasionally take breaks from pushing to give it a little time to stretch and only push when YOU feel the need to. I ignored the nurse telling me to push and did it the way I felt was right and I have no tears.If OBs think this helps very little, why was the OB that was overseeing the residents that were in the room when I was giving birth doing this to help me stretch?

jennisgreat | November 29 , 2007 4:13 PM

re: Q: Tears During Delivery?

Forgot to mention that I did the perineal massage for 5 weeks. I found sitting on the can worked best for me while I was doing it.

jennisgreat | November 29 , 2007 4:17 PM

re: Q: Tears During Delivery?

Yeah, I'm with the above poster- everything I've read says that you should push when you feel the urge and not when your doctor tells you to. Pushing on command is even discouraged by a friend of mine, who is a labour and delivery nurse.

annabelle.27 | March 03 , 2008 11:30 PM

re: Q: Tears during delivery?

I also agree with pp's. The 'purple pushing' method is BAD - nurses, doctors, even your own mother cannot tell you when to push because they cannot FEEL your body and feel what it's telling YOU. Only YOU can listen to your body and it will tell you when to push - it's called 'spontaneous pushing' - you listen to your own body's signals and it will actually eventually even push for you - like a spontaneous, involuntary push. Weird analogy, but it's like when you throw up - you can't control it, your body does. It's like throwing up except your body is throwing 'down' to push the baby out. And no nurse or doctor can really tell when that is happening. AND.. doing this is the best way you can help 'prevent' tearing - letting your body do the work when it needs to instead of being told by someone else.

jholtzman | July 10 , 2008 12:12 PM

re: Q: Tears during delivery?

but if you push too soon you can rupture your cervix - I know someone that happened to

Cytina | August 04 , 2008 4:13 PM

re: Q: Tears during delivery?

I watched my friend deliever and she had no tears but she STOPPED when the midwife said to. I think that is the important part but sorry ladies they can see what is going on down there and there is a point when you need to STOP pushing so you don't tear. I agree 100% to NOT push if you dont feel the need to push.

firsttimemomMT | February 22 , 2009 5:16 PM

re: Q: Tears during delivery?

Every woman is different and a few of my friends who did not have any medication could not feel the urge to push at all, were totally confused and told me that being guided through it was critical. They did not tear at all incidentally.

Sugarpot | July 07 , 2009 5:33 AM

re: Q: Tears during delivery?

Meh. If I tear, I tear. I don't think I'll have time to give myself a vagina massage for the next 5 weeks lol

BuddhaKitty | July 13 , 2009 7:59 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I'm actually wondering if putting some lubricant on the opening of the vagina during labor might ease the process of getting the baby's head through - shouldn't it reduce the burning and friction and reduce likelihood of tearing?

lenuka2007 | August 14 , 2009 11:08 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

My midwife is having me bring an new bottle of olive oil to the delivery and she will use it to message the around my vagina while the baby's head is crowing. This helps moisturize, stretch, and lubricate like you mention.

julieb00lie | September 12 , 2009 7:18 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I tore but it wasn't due to pushing, it was due to my beautiful daughter sticking her arm through with her head. My OB tried to get me to stop the push so she could help but at that point I couldn't stop the push and I tore. I'm sore but it's nothing too miserable. My OB recommends witch hazel but I haven't been able to locate it in my local stores, I'll probably go one town over and look, cause it would be nice to heal a lil quicker if that's possible. BTW, if you do tear, try to do whatever you can to keep your bowel movements as soft as possible. I wasn't paying attention after delivery (too busy with the baby) to remember that the epidural and pain meds constipate and I've been playing Colace catch up ever since.

cettafire | September 26 , 2009 9:48 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

Has anyone heard of Epi-No? It's a product made in Germany to episiotomy or perineal tear from natural birth. http://www.avoidepisiotomy.com/ Both my doctor and the trainer for our childbirth prep class recommended it. It's not available in US. You can buy from an online pharmacy in Austrlia. I think it took about 1-2 weeks for shipping. http://epharmacy.com.au/product.asp?id=47723&pname=EPI%2DNO+Delphine+Plus+Birth+and+Postnatal+Trainer+Device I tried the manual perineal massage and it was a little uncomfortable with my DH's help. Have been trying this for a few days now and you can progress daily by increasing the size. Don't know if it'll help at the end, but doesn't hurt to try. I also notice my urinary incontinence has been cured. Not sure if it was a result of using Epi-No, but I haven't had any accidents since I started using it. I was very hesistant to buy this in the beginning due to cost and since they don't sell in U.S., but my DH convinced me to. I'm really glad I got it now. It's easy to use, not as painful as manual perineal massage, you can increase the size of the balloon to help you stretch, and it's cured my urinary incontinence.

susu1105 | January 06 , 2010 5:11 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I just wanted ladies to know that sometimes it can't be prevented. With my first delivery, I deliverd an 8lb 13oz boy who wanted his arm folded when he wanted to bring it out. I was delivering his shoulders and an arm at the same time! Despite all the messaging my midwives did, I still tore. They probably would have given me and episiotomy, but I actually asked to not have one, and to just tear if it was going to happen. You tent to tear at the weakest point in your muscle, causing the stronger parts to still be in tact. I was a little sore, but probably no more than usual. The massage may have prevented me from tearing all the way to my rectum though, so I would suggest it, atleast during delivery.

taffie | January 10 , 2010 2:36 AM