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Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

If a baby is found to be positive for down syndrome, is termination possible at 19 - 20 wks?

Re: If a baby is found to be positive for down syndrome, is termination possible at 19 - 20 wks?

The Bump Expert

Termination is generally possible at 19-20 weeks, but the later in pregnancy you have the termination, the greater the risks are to you of having a complication from the procedure such as significant bleeding or injury to your intestines or bladder. The gestational age restrictions for termination of pregnancy are legal restrictions and vary state by state.

Dr. Ashley Roman

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

This post is very disturbing to me. I would never consider termination even if the baby does have down syndrome. Children with downs are extremely lovable.

lsugirl852 |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

I think this a disturbing post. I could never terminate and hate to think that someone would just because the outome is perfect or how they imagined it would be.

miniddev |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

This question disgusts me.

Kimba1185 |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

I am very bothered by this as well. Having worked with many children and adults with Down Syndrome I do not see this as justification whatsoever for terminating a pregnancy. Yes, raising a child with DS willl take a little more work, but the joy someone will get back from their child will be well worth it. I would never terminate due to DS!

LisnJon |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

I am in the high risk category for having a baby with Down Syndrome and I could never terminate my baby willingly. I had an u/s at 11 weeks and the baby was moving it's hand up and down and near it's face and I just cannot imagine even ASKING that question at 19 weeks!!! Why on earth would someone wait this long to decide that? I won't know for sure unless I have an amnio and it's out of our hands. I love this little baby no matter what is to be!

BebeVee |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

How terrible! It might be a scary situation to face, but to end a life is wrong. My cousin has severe cerberal paulsy and he is the greatest gift from God.

k.grahl@hotmail.com |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

I am having the DS test in a few weeks. I will be around 17 weeks Pregnant. If it comes back Positive I will terminate the pregnancy. I have a friend that has a DS son and it has been a complete nightware for their entire family. It has been worst for the little guy. He is sweet but he can't make friends and he even asked his mom why he can't have friends at school and why kids make fun of him. I wouldn't want to raise a child in this situation. I think it would selfish of me to make a child go through life getting made fun of and looked at everyday.

Oct092004Bride |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

To the pp who would terminate her DS child b/c he or she might be made fun of: Have you asked your friend if she wished she had disposed of her baby?And.....How can you guarantee that your "perfectly healthy" child won't be made fun of for some reason? Maybe your child will be obese or wear glasses or have a learning disability? Kids are cruel, it's a part of life. As good parents you help the child through that.And just because the child clears the test for Downs doesn't mean he/she won't have any other birth defect. How will you justify your "selfish" choice to have the child then? Perhaps you need to justify aborting a child that in your eyes is not perfect? Well good luck with that.What has our society come to where we just randomly decide what is worthy of life and what isn't? And by the way....you could have already had a CVS (still in first trimester)or an amnio to determine if the baby has Downs or Trisomy 18. Why would you wait til 17 weeks when you would have to abort a fetus that is developed to the point it can suck it's thumb?

BebeVee |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

Unfortunatley, I am in the age group for these tests to be administered when I finally get pg. I don't think I would terminate even if the baby had Downs, that would be a decision I could never live with.

Frankie'sGirl05 |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

It's such a personal question and no matter what you choose you will have to live with it. I personally would choose to terminate. I've seen genetic dysfunctions totally rip apart families. It's not fair to bring a child into the world with so many health problems not to mention the socializing problems they have as a result. I couldn't do that knowing that I may die and there would be nobody to take care of my child other than an institution. I do agree that this should have been discovered earlier in the pregnancy and the decision should have already been made.

prettypiphi |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

Thanks goodness we live in a country where we have a choice in the matter! Everyone has a different threshold of what they can emotionally & physically take. Caring for a disabled child is very, very difficult. I give credit to those who realize this is beyond their capacity and terminate. I also give credit to those who give care & love to these babies, children and adults whether it be the parents or when, often as they get bigger, they need to be put in a special home.

goldilocks415 |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

I don't think this question is disgusting at all as there are people out there that will have to make this choice and they should be given all the factual information available to readily come to the conclusion that is most appropriate for the individual mother's and her family's needs. Personally, I would have the greatest difficulty making that choice should I ever be given the news and every bit of information I could muster would put me towards the choice I could personally live with. Questions like these are valid and I personally, would like to see more of them.

PentacleSeven |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

To everyone that said I should have had the test done earlier. I would have loved to but my doctors said that it can't be done until week 16. I would have had it done as soon as I become pregnant. I would hate to terminate a pregnacy. I just feel as if it would be a selfish act if I did so.

Oct092004Bride |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

FYI for all of those considering diagnostic testing....PP said that she couldn't have amnio til 16 weeks which is correct. Where she is incorrect however is saying she couldn't have ANY testing done until then.There is a very common test called CvS (Chorionic Villus Sampling) that is available starting at 11 weeks (when you are still in your first trimester) which also tests for Down Syndrome. SO.....you DON'T have to wait til baby is bigger than a half a pound to abort because of chromosomal abnormalities like Downs.Choice is great and necessary. But let's get our facts straight before playing that card.

BebeVee |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

To BebeVee...Maybe YOU should get your facts straight. CVS has an accuracy rate of 50%. While I wouldn't ever consider terminating a pregnancy because of a 50/50 chance of problems, a more dependable test like amniocentisis might change my mind.Choice IS great and necessary. Another great thing is witholding judgement. I doubt Oct092004Bride relishes the thought of terminating a pregnancy, but not everybody feels equipped to care for a special-needs child. I can't say what I would do in her situation, but I'd like to think I would receive more support than she's getting. I'm glad to know now, before I need it, that this site is not one where I would feel comfortable discussing my problems.Oct092004Bride, my prayers are with you during this difficult time, and I wish you the best of luck no matter what the outcome of your test or what decision you make.

mrsmoulton |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

All I have to say is one really will not know what they will do until they are actually in the situation. And like Goldilocks said, I am glad I live in a country where I have the choice and freedom to choose what is best for me and my family.

whirlygal |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

To anyone experiencing something like this I wish all the best, no matter what decision they make. It is every individual mother or family's choice and it must be an incredibly difficult one to make. It is not for any of us to pass judgement on them. Thet need support and understanding, not knee-jerk religious disgust and scorn.

happysparkle |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

Oh MRS.MOULTON....Where do you come up with your numbers? Get YOUR facts straight. CVS has an accuracy rate of 98-99%! You think a doctor would take placenta samplings with a 50/50 accuracy rate...C'mon! This is from the American Pregnancy Association...What do chorionic villus sampling (CVS) results mean?CVS is a diagnostic test that detects chromosome abnormalities and genetic disorders with high levels of accuracy (98-99%). Although the probabilities of identification are high, this test does not measure the severity of these disorders. This test does not help identify neural tube defects.And no one is judging or spouting knee jerk religious scorn. I am pro choice and believe a woman had the right to do what she feels is right for her. Where we are parting ways here is a timing issue. If someone thinks they cannot handle having a special needs child then how about asking some simple questions of their doctor and having the first test available. This isn't rocket science or secretly guarded facts from the medical profession. (Although it seems there are some people who make stuff up like previous posters).Having a "medical" abortion in the first trimester is radically different than a "surgical" abortion that may need to be done in the second trimester. And there can be complications to the mother as well including infertility.My whole point of this is ask questions of your physician and find out your options early on so you can be informed and enjoy your pregnancy or make that tough decision.Good luck to all the moms out there and a happy healthy 9 months to you all.

BebeVee |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

this question is very disturbing...my mother gave birth to twin girls who BOTH had downs.... They are now 16 and have lived the best life I could ever imagine...not only are they loving they can be very smart too if you try ... My mom is as active in the downs syndrome community as possible...enrolling the girls in camp and schools and going to a mutual church with other children with disabilites have made them a ton of friends...they might not be perfect but in their eyes everyone is perfect and I couldnt see anyone living without those children.... no one makes fun of them...they are and always have been extremely popular in school...and I am talking normal public school...nowadays kids have learned diversity and this isnt out of the norm for them!

JenRose05 |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

I grew up with a mentally handicapped sister who is moderate-severly disabled. Life with her was never any picnic and our family made a lot of sacrifices along the way. Her behavior was difficult to live with and she was and still is a burden to the family and society. I love her very much and am very protective of her, but she will never hold an actual job or live independently. She stays all day in a sheltered workshop with ignorant ill-experienced staff. I couldn't bring myself to have a child with a major disability like that because I've seen first hand the past 30 years what it has done to our family and the worry and guilt we live with every day for her. She is in a group home now with very little, if any, community involvement. When you can no longer care for your adult son/daughter many of them end up in state schools or facilities that are quite often filled with abuse, over crowding and neglect. With DS, there are many different levels of the handicap, but they have a lifetime of health problems and usually don't live as long as normal people.

ylimebride |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

Wow...this is a very touchy subject. Myself personally I wouldn't terminate a baby with DS because of a lot of reasons. First off I think it's wrong and there's no other way to say it. I think it is good to find out early on that way you can somewhat prepare yourself for raising the baby. Second I had a lot of health problems when I was born...not DS but a lot and sure it would have been easy for my parents to terminate me had they known about all these problems or even give me up but they didn't because they wanted me. I think it's harsh to call a baby with DS a burden because if you think about it at some point everyone's a burden to someone whether they are a special needs child or an extremely difficult rebellious teenager or a grown parent who can no longer take care of themselves and for whatever reason can't be in a home and has to live with their grown kids and their family. It's a lump of life and I think people should try to work through it.

LadyNieto |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

Plain and simple - i will love my child no matter what. God gave me this precious gift and I could never do anything to harm it in any way. This question discusts me.

lvisser |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

I am sorry to see that most of the comments in response to your question are negative and judgmental -- some women would never chose to terminate a baby with Down syndrome, and that is their prerogative, just as it is yours to terminate at whatever point in your pregnancy you choose within the legal limit. Don't feel like you are alone, either. According to this NY Times article (with a link to pubMed), over NINETY PERCENT of women with a prenatal diagnosis of Down syndrome terminate. Also, there are message boards on babycenter that focus on women considering termination; you might want to go there to get support. Good luck with your decision!http://www.nytimes.com/2007/05/09/us/09down.html?ex=1187928000&en=463181cbb99713c6&ei=5070

mishy611 |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

THIS IS SICK!!! It is a blessing to have children. When I found out I was pegnant, I jumped for joy knowing that I have the ability to even become pregnant. The question is selfish... the child didnt ask to be brought here, and because of YOUR genetic make-up, you want to kill him/her. WOW... it is amazing how truly ignorant the world (and the people in it) can be.

Tinnelle |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

What disgusts me about this post are all of the narrow minded jerks that are posting replies. I am sure that anyone who makes the choice to terminate a pregnancy due to birth defects has made an extremely difficult and emotionaly straining decision but the decision that is right for her and her family. She doesn't need the added strain of strangers bashing her for her personal decision. The women posting the question wanted to get a medical answer, not flamed by ignorant people who have too much time on their hands. If life is so important to you then go out and get one of your own and leave this poor woman alone.

RedHeadRenee |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

I totally agree with the pp. Who are any of you to judge someone that is faced with that decision? Everyone is entitled to their opinion but must you be so rude about it? I can't believe the amount of posts that said they were disgusted by the question. What age are we living in? Did anyone out there even begin to think that not all of us are so well off that others might not be able to financially care for a child with special needs? Since most of you got up on your soap boxes maybe you would all be willing to part with the cash for it. I think you should be happy to live some where you have a choice. Get over yourselves!

Mikeysgirl923 |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

No one knows how or what they would do until they are in this situation!!!!! Do not judge! I am 29 years old and my unborn daughter has Ds. I am 24 weeks along, and the range of emotions is heart wrenching. There would be no reason for someone who is not at risk to have a CVS. It is not anything I would have ever thought of. A CVS would not be warranted at all. Nothing would be wrong with my baby! My quad screen came back abnormal at 17 weeks and was confirmed by amnio at 18 weeks. So that is why someone would wait so long. It was unknown until 18 weeks. I would never have thought of having an abortion prior to this situation, but until you are told that your daughter will be retarded you do not know!!! I would have said before that I will take whatever God gives me. Well that is easy to say until it happens to you. I can't beleive the amount of woman who are judging about this when they have no idea. This is the worst thing my husband and I have ever gone through. The feelings of not wanting a planned baby or wishing to miscarriage are so terrible. We were faced with terminating and almost did twice. I am so angered by these posts. They are out of plain ignorance and lack of education on the matter. Why would it matter if you terminated in your first or second tri-mester?? You are still killing your baby and it is the same process. Most woman do not find out till after their quad tests come back abnormal. I will choose to have a CVS next time but only because I am at risk now. Please do not speak if you have not walked in someones shoes. Unless someone has given you this diagnosis you have no idea. I would never wish this upon anyone!!!!

kjc78 |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

I think that anyone who is faced with this decision is not taking it lightly. I think Ds is a scary thought to face and unless you yourself have faced the situation you are REALLY REALLY wrong to judge. I myself have 2 siblings with severe learning disablities and life with them was and is hard. I was teased myself for having siblings with problems I had to be their and my own defender all thoughout school and still people recoil away when meeting my siblings. Now that I am married and DH and I are planning on TTC I had to face telling my parents that when they are gone I will not be my siblings care givers because I will have my own family to care for and I do not want my unborn children faced with maybe needing to be the care givers for their Aunt and Uncle. i have seen the struggle for my family first hand, i have seen the torment my sister faces every day. She is VERY unhappy and has never found a neiche to fit into no matter how hard my parents tried. She is miserable and unhappy and I feel badly for her. My DH and I are undergoing genetic counseling because while these problems are not considered to be genetic I would not want to go through this heartbreak with a child of my own. Good luck to you and know the decision you make are the best for you your family and your children!

pixiedustie |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

As a woman struggling with inferility, I wish this woman would have this baby and give it to me. I have worked with so many children and adults with down syndrome and they are beautiful and so special. Anybody read the book "Memory Keeper's Daughter?"

foxybride |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

I think it's absolutely disgusting to even consider termination because your child won't be just perfect!! Children with Downs Syndrome have been known to be the most loving, happy children. To think that you have the privilege of conceiving a child, then would throw it away because it's not normal. I knew a family who adopted a child with Downs Syndrome and they loved their daughter dearly. To think that they CHOSE her while others would terminate. Give your imperfect child up for adoption and let someone less selfish raise your child.

anniemacgregor |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

Just because the decision is not for you don't judge others for the decisions that they feel is right for themselves. Keep your thoughts to yourself, this is a legit medical question that I'm sure the author thought that it was possible she was going to get this kind of response. Not only that, other women are probably wondering the same exact thing. A woman needs to look at all her options. I don't believe that termination is a possible choice for myself but it is for others. Don't pass judgement on others. This is only between the mother, father and God. God should be the only judge. Watch Cider House Rules and see what happens when termination is NOT an option for a mother. There are always two sides.

Mrs. Eckhart |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

I agree that everyone is entitled to his or her own decision. However, for those of you that are appalled by people that say they would terminate pregnancy due to DS think about further down the line. What happens to your child when you are no longer there to take care of them? Were do they go. I do not have any siblings and if both my husband and I die, what happens to my child whose life depends on me?

Katielv143 |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

Hmmm....I probably cant tell you for sure what I'd do unless I was currently in the situation.....but I would entertain the idea of terminating. The world is cruel enough without having a disability like DS. I dont know that I could provide the level of emotional protection to my child to keep them from being hurt by the idiots that are out there who would judge them for having DS or any other disability for that matter.....And, as I see someone else mentioned on here...I can't be here to help them forever....someday when I'm gone, who can I depend on to care for my child who will need care for the rest of his/her life? I would definetly consider terminating, and I feel bad for the girl who originally posted this question because of the rude responses. I hope everything worked out for the best for you.

ponygurl81 |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

I can't believe the people who are saying the idea is disgusting. I guarantee none of those people have children with DS. The choice is completely personal (and it is a choice, by the way) and you have no idea how hard it is until you are in that situation. A very close personal friend of mine has a son with down syndrome and I've volunteered with her and her family at our local Down syndrome association. However, her life is anywhere from easy. She and her husband are constantly struggling financially. They both have masters degrees, great jobs, and work full time. And they worry about their daughter who does not have downs, and how she'll be responsible for caring for their son when they're no longer around.Depending on the severity of the down syndrome your child has and how much time you have to personally work with them you may not be able to handle it. The people I know who have children with downs have to spend a lot of money on tutors and special classes. Their son can't go to a normal school and with both parents working full time jobs they can't teach him themselves. Having a child with down syndrome is a constant struggle financially and emotionally. I would understand why a woman would consider termination. And I think its unfair of people who have never been in this situation to get all self-rightous and call someone digusting when they're just brave enough to admit they can't handle the challenge of raising a special needs child.

mrsfasola |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

wow. i mean, i understand having a child with a disability is hard. i have a brother with autism and it was never easy. but now, as an adult, and even when i was young, i could not imagine my life without him around. the fact is, we are all created with strengths and weaknesses and that is what makes the world a wonderful and beautiful place. you cannot simply terminate a life because it isn't what you expect. no child will ever be exactly what you expect. ever.

PMJacobsen |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

Wow. I don't know if I'm more troubled by the sheer volume of negative responses to this question or the fact that all of the women who wrote them are either trying to conceive, pregnant, or already parents. Just what the world needs: more ignorant, intolerant, judgmental, and self-righteous people running around. Here's a novel idea, ladies: instead of hopping up on your soap boxes to loudly proclaim your moral righteousness, why not consider an actual answer to the question? Then, when you realize that-- whoops!-- you don't actually have anything relevant, let alone remotely helpful to say, you can save your breath and spare us all your hurtful, unwarranted comments and find something productive to do with your time and effort. And as for the woman who originally posted this question, as I've never had the misfortune of being in your incredibly difficult situation, the only thing I can say is that I sincerely hope that the road to your final decision isn't as fraught with intolerance as this ridiculous message board. Good luck to you.

alexgolightly |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

I agree with the pp. I am not in this situation, so who am I to say it is disgusting appalling, or whatever. People are so quick to judge and say what they wouldn't do. For the women who are faced with this difficult decision, just know what ever decision you make is what is best for you. Don't let ANYONE make you feel guilty about your choice.

missmea |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

I am an educator and I love all of my students. I could not imagine walking on campus and not seeing the many special needs students I work with. My personal thought is that life is not perfect, and we should not pretend that having a perfect baby will make our lives "perfect." I can only say what I would not do...however, I will not sit in judgement of anyone else who chooses to make the choice. Either way, they must live with their choice, and it is a difficult choice to make!!!! Take care.

hihobb |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

As a health professional who deals with new prenatal dx of DS, we are taught not to say things like oh kids with down syndrome are always happy, etc. Some people in the DS community take offense to generalizations like that. FYI

GoBadgers |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

My sister who waited 35 years for a baby had to terminate, it was not a developmental disorder but a physical that would have given the child two years of agony before a very painful death. She is the first person who would love her child regardless of who and what they are, but she is also a realist who understood what that life would be like.You can never know what you will do in a situation like this untill you are in it. What if you have other chldren? This seanrio can often bankrupt a family, is it right for your other kids to never have a college fund, free time, or a carefree youth, because they must care for a disabled sibling? Often this is the case for the rest of their lives. They most likely will not begrudge their sibling because they love them, but they also never have the opportunity to know any other type of reality.Lets just hope for healthy children, and DEMAND funding for programs that will help families who are already in these situations.

Amy&Anthony |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

This post disturbs me as well. I LOVE my sister with Down Syndrome and wouldn't consider it a burden on our lives at all! She always has the best attitude and loves everyone she meets. I'm jealous of her outlook on life. She just wants to have a good time and love everyone. To the people who said it would be selfish to raise a child with Down Syndrome: I think you are selfish!!!

Alligator |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

Before my mom knew she was pregnant with me she went to get her tubes tied. They didn't do any test to see if she was pregnant or anything. They drugged her up and cut her open and the doctor found me inside. Then her father died (stress is hard on a pregnancy) then she got severe food poisoning at a restaurant. All of this when she was pregnant with me. The doctor "advised" her to get an abortion because I would either be mentally challanged or die soon after birth because of his screw up with the operation and the other things. Obviously my mom didn't get an abortion, and I'm thankful for that.So needless to say, I am against abortion in any case of being mentally challenged. The doctor was wrong, because I turned out fine. Who's to say anyother doctor is wrong and you are terminating a pregnancy of a perfectly fine baby? So yes, you can say that was a long time ago (I am 21 years old) and medical technology is way better now. Well I have a cousin who had a baby 3 years ago and while she was pregnant they said her baby would have down syndrome, and she turned out fine too.

MJ Lundrigan |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

The only thing I find disgusting aboutthis thread are the judgements people are making about someoen asking a question that woudl be hard for anyoe She didn't ask if you thought it was right ad she certainly doens't need your scorn or disdain fifshe is facing this difficult and very personal decsion which I am sure will affect her for the rest of her life no matter what she decides. I fid your answers more repulsive than anythign she could decide- I ask who in the world ar eyou to stand in judgement of her or what she might decide to do in her family planning. You guys (the judgemtnal posters) are gross to me. Personally I don't knwo that I could terminate-- but I surely don't stand in judgment of those who do and if I were in her situation who knows, though I would liek to have though I could talk to someone hear without being judged-- clearly not.

changingnames |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

ok, my best friend has a baby w.DS and there are people who are confusing DS w/more major mental retardation and I can tell you they are not the same. There are colleges for children with DS. I am not judging people who have to make such a didfficult choince, nor do I think anyone else should either, but PLEASE do not try and get facts from random strangers on a web sight. Speak to DR's and actually you would be much more informed by parents of those w/DS children. Although I appreciate much of the concern most women give on this sight, I also find it to be the MOST JUDGEMENTAL, place you will ever go. People on this sight are just that people and infortunately people can be very judgemental, so please whenever considering making such life changing choices do NOT get you info from chat rooms. As you can see it varies greatly

thelonelywife |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

I don't know how anyone would want to willingly terminate their pregnancy. I had a miscarriage in November 2006 that was and still is very hard for me. I would have taken that baby no matter what!

Kmills2bein05 |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

I think there are some judgemental people out there as demonstrated by these posts. Ironically, it's for the same reason one may consider to terminate. I thought this was a support, not an ambush.

SmittenGirl |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

I don't like to judge without knowing the circumstances. However, my little sister has Down Syndrome and life without her wouldn't be the same. She is my little angel and I love her so much. I can't even imagine terminating a pregnancy because the child may have Down Syndrome. And the severities are different. My little sis has a pretty severe case of Downs but I know several other people with DS and they have a mild case. They are fully functioning citizens of our society. I recommend at least giving up the baby for adoption. Not abortion. Some people love DS kids and will adopt them.

FemmeRides |

re: Q: Down Syndrome Termination?

I skipped to the end after about 10 posts, so forgive me if I am repeating. Like many, I agree that women have the right to make their own decisions, however I encourage all women to make informed pregnancy choices. Do your homework and carefully consider the short- and long-term consequences of your choices. Furthermore, on a personal level, it saddens me to read that many of you would terminate a child with DS because "it wouldn't be fair to them...it would be selfish to keep them." It seems to me that it is selfish to discard them for lack of motivation to bear the burden of parenting a (possibly) more difficult child. Additionally, with all the heartbroken ladies on here who are TTC without success, I bet their hearts long for the babies that you are giving up. Remember that a viable option is adoption, and it is often the most loving choice you can make. It you do not think that you can be the parent this child needs, please consider giving the gift of life to this baby and to a family out there who is longing for a little one of their own.

junebridelt |

re: Q: Down syndrome termination?

I agree with the PP; this is a medical question, not one to be answered or judged by those of us on the message board. And while it is long past, I'm sure it will come up again. The OP did not ask for anyone's opinions, thoughts or emotional stories. More or less, this question warrants a simple yes/no response by a medical professional.It's a shame that people are so quick to judge and make negative comments. Sharing your opinion or lending advice is one thing, being insensitive and rude is quite another. TheNest is a great board and parents can find great information, but the catty comments are never helpful.

Erin0422 |

re: Q: Down syndrome termination?

Terminating a pregnancy for whatever reason is a personal choice, and a very difficult one at that. Instead of looking down on eachother and professing how "superior" our own moral standards would be in this situation, we should be supporting eachother through whatever happens.

birdzofzodiac |

re: Q: Down syndrome termination?

I understand that this question is disturbing. Most of us dont agree with it. BUT it is on here for a reason. Some people cant handle the facts. This is a real question posed in peoples minds. They have the right to know, even if we dont agree with it.

LadyKittyDecay |

re: Q: Down syndrome termination?

While a friend was pregnant, she found out that her baby had a rare bone disorder which would cause bones to break easily and often. It would be an incredibly painful and difficult life, for both parents and child. She was told by doctors to abort, but because we know God created life, and we trust in his plan, we prayed and prayed, put our trust in him and she decided to keep the baby. And the baby was born free of any issues. It is a miracle story, because she didn't remove God from the equation.

nicoleafurrow |

re: Q: Down syndrome termination?

This is absolutely horrifying! I can't believe you would even want children. There are many diseases and things your child can have. Kids are cruel and do make fun of other kids no matter who they are. I am a teacher and see it everyday. I have a sister who can't have children and she would be happy to have any child. God has a plan for all of us!

tenny06 |

re: Q: Down syndrome termination?

I think it is a very touchy subject, but it all comes down to the matter of personal choice. I at first said I wouldn't want my child to have to go through it, but after reading what everyone else has said, it gives me a different outlook so to speak.

tohave2hold |

re: Q: Down syndrome termination?

Absolutely terrible! I am sick to my stomach to think that someone would want to take their childs life just because they have a disability. I am 19 weeks pregnant and my baby has symptoms of DS. Although i am sad that he/she may have a harder life, this means that i have to give this baby more love and i am fine with that, i know i have a lot of love to give.

csund |

re: Q: Down syndrome termination?

How about people with a more advance degree of DS (sorry don't know the exact term).. What if you child had no way to communicate with the exterior word other than vomit when in an unpleasant situation.. Its a hard decision to make.. Im not one for religion but more for science or "normal progression of nature".. What happens if an animal comes to life with a "disability"? If the mother does not terminate its life, it is going to die. Because in nature, the mom won't care for its baby all of its life.. Not saying this should be the way for humans but it makes you think.. Also if society thought terminating was not the right thing to do for some people, we would not have access to screening tests. Because honestly, why would you test if you never thought about termination if the child was not healthy..

caromartin |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

I noticed that a lot of the posters were either 1) siblings of children with DS or 2) educators who work with children with DS. I noticed a couple of posts from parents with children who MAY have DS. Is anyone on here who actually has children with DS? Going out on a limb here, I would think it is radically different if you are a parent, versus a sibling or educator. I'm also curious -- say the OP had the baby, but gave it up for adoption. How would the comments change? Would she be "damned if she did, and damned if she didn't"? Would those individuals who were so against termination be willing to take on the responsibilities of raising a child with DS?

lorimcox |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

I don't agree with this question and personally I would never considering termination just b/c my baby had downs, but then again this person is only asking a question and looking to find info. Just because some might have different beliefs does not mean we can judge what another person feels is right (or wrong for that matter.)

crackelmo44@hotmail.com |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

I think it's sad that we live in a society where parents comfort is more important than providing needs for a child. That they would terminate a child just because they would be an inconvenience. Maybe one day when they are old, they will get a terminal illness that will make society want to terminate them for being a burden. It's also sad that kids would still make fun of other kids over an illness or something that is not controlable and that their parents don't educate them right from wrong because of the arrogant and selfish society we live in. I worked with a person who has down syndrome, and the whole office loved him and respected him and gave him a chance. I know of 2 children with downs syndrome, and with proper love and attention. I also know of couples who took the test, were told they were at high risk, and gave birth to a perfectly healthy baby without downs syndrome. Imagine if fear got the best of them and they terminated. If you terminate, it's your choice not mine, but in the end, it's a sign of what our society as a whole has become and that part is sad.

EdithR |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

Well bottom line is that it is a personal decision. I for one couldn't terminate it but if you really don't want to take on the task why not put the baby up for adoption? there are plenty of families out there willing to love that child. and in the end you might change your mind anyway.. my friend just had little boy last month and eventhough he is a healthy & adorable little boy she had been planning on giving him up for abortion...but after going thru the pregnancy and seeing her little boy..she changed her mind.

nov_dove |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

Im personally pro-choice, but at 20 weeks you might as well push the baby out and stab it in the heart. If you can't deal with your kid being less than perfect by a barbie doll instead.

christmasbaby09 |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

I know there are a lot of suggestions that the OP should have the baby and put him/her up for adoption, but IMHO I would think it would be hard to find willing parents for a baby with any sort of special challenges. Isn't that why so many people in the US adopt from other countries? Just something to keep in mind.

mmyslivec |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

my mum was strongly advised to terminate me as i had 'severe' deformities and wouldnt live longer than 24hours. im not 19years old and 38weeks pregnant fit and healthy. if she had decided to terminate on a doctors advice i wouldnt be here. imagine how many babies are terminated because of a doctors advice and would of in fact lived to be perfectly healthy people. i could never terminate a baby for any reason, it didnt ask to be created. terminating so late in pregnancy is quite disturbing to me, this baby can already swallow and digest...its living and feels pain. i undertsnad living with a down syndrome child can be difficult, but ive seen the joy they can bring, no more or less than a healthy baby

hanzbaybee |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

This is a horrible post and I wish this website never put it up. We're talking about murdering your own baby...horrific.

GingerSchooling@gmail.com |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

its a real issue..one that anyone who has had an amnio has had to consider.. its good that this post is up for those who are battling with that descision..it is a personal choice for them ..not for anyone to judge but rather be thankfull that you don't have to make that decision..it is indeed horrible..when i had my amnio i considered what would i do...when i reallly researched how they would do such a procedure if i chose to terminate i realised there was no way i could do that and would go ahead with the pregnancy...but it is a personal choice..if i hadn't known the procedure maybe i would have chosen differently..thank god i didn't have to choose..

den246 |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

This is a very real issue to many if not all expectant mothers... we all worry about our baby's health, and always will, even after they're born. It's a personal choice, I know what I would do, but won't and will never force my judgement on others. I hope this posting and all the subsequent answers will, however, make one thing very clear: waiting until 16-20 weeks to find out this information, if it is important to you and throws into question your ability or desire to have the baby, is NOT the way to go. It sounds as if the expectant mother asking the question should change doctors immediately. A CVS test is taken between 10-12 weeks, is almost 100% accurate, and should be explained to any pregnant woman concerned about DS.

hkfallon@msn.com |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

i Can't believe this who would do that, if i find out my baby has down sy. or somthing like it i would'nt care my cousin has it and he is the most wonderful person i know. i will love my baby no matter what.

TaylorC91 |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

Whoever asked this question; its YOUR decision. Whether or not this question 'disturbs' other people. Abortion is never an easy answer nor is it 'convenient'. Google your home state laws pertaining to the issue, while also having 'the talk' with your doctor and loved ones. You're going to need loved ones by your side if this takes place.

leeshaaaa |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

I agree that anyone who makes the choice to terminate a pregnancy due to birth defects faces an extremely difficult situation - and being a mother is extremely difficult for many other reasons. I pray for anyone facing this - but this decision should only be made by God.

Sheiney |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

The question is if termination is possible, not if you think she should or should not do it. It's her choice that she has to live with. No judgemnet please!

Jujubee952 |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

I totally agree with the above comment. People terminate for reasons not as serious as this. i am not saying that one is better than the other. however, we are so blessed to live in a society where we have the freedom of choice. Being a parent is challenging no matter what. It is a personal decision one must make for themselves and a child that may or may not be here. You are iin my prayers for guidance in your decision making process. whatever you decide, may God keep and bless you both.

CandiStarr |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

Ok. I've read a good number of these post and in all honesty who the hell are you all to judge her decision? This is not an easy choice for anyone to make. You cannot judge if you haven't been there. Pregnancy is a gift and all but so is the choice to keep the child or not. If you cannot provide for a disabled child would it be better to have it and have to give it up or to terminate. Yes its genetics but no one asked for the child to be disabled just like the child didn't ask to be here. It is incredible that in this day and age people could be so closed minded. If you don't agree that's your right but don't bash a woman whose going through such a difficult time. And if you want to throw God and religion into the mix I'm pretty sure God commands us to love each other like we love ourselves and Jesus said he without sin be the first to cast a stone. Have none of you ever had to make a difficult decision that you had to live with? I am pregnant due in 6 days and I'm barely ready to take care of a healthy baby. Children are precious but they are also a lot of work and if I had found out my daughter had a birth defect I would honesty have to think about termination although it would hurt me and I wouldn't want to do it. But I will not be selfish and bring in a child that I wouldn't be able to be a good mother to. And you can take that as you wish because in judging people you're only setting yourself up for judgment be it divine judgment or just that of your fellow mothers and mothers to be. Sorry for the rant but I found the negativity repulsive and I hope that anyone going through this doesn't have to go through this alone.

deilnangel3 |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

First, I'd like to say to the original poster that I'm very sorry you even have to consider termination. Especially if this was a planned child. I can't imagine what you must be going through. I would consider adoption, though. If finances and emotions are the reason you feel ill-equipped to deal with a speacial needs child, you should know that there are many mothers and fathers out there who are just waiting for a Down's baby to love.

juliew1420@yahoo.com |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

I wish people weren't so narrow minded - what an awful situation to be in - I know! When you find out things may not be according plan you can not image the emotions involved - it is a rollercoaster and you don't know when it will end!!!! Millions of thoughts run through ones head - options need to be assessed and each decision is so personal - what people need is support and information - not condemnation - you don't know what this is like unless you are in this situation and everyone is different and deals with things in a different way and also have different support networks - all the tests are not 100% - you may believe this but it is not true - some soft markers turn out nothing and sometimes NOTHING is found throughout the pregnancy and yet a baby is born with DS! It is more of a shock - It is very different to "know" someone or to be a sibling or related than be the actual mother/father and going through the situation - There is a choice and even if you don't need to take it or won't take please don't condem others for doing so - it is in no way an easy decision. Someone came on asking a question - either answer it, offer information and support or don't comment! It is about information and options not personal opinions!!!!

Vixster78 |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

For anyone faced with this decision (whether it be as a result of a DS diagnosis, or any one of a number of fatal/life altering complications) you should know you are not alone. There is a support group that helped a friend of mine who found out late in her pregnancy that her child basically had no brain. The group is called “A Heartbreaking Choice” and this is their web site http://www.aheartbreakingchoice.com/ You will find much more help support and compassion there than you ever will on a site like this. Peace, Allison

akennonf |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

I find it sad that Adoption doesn't even come up. I am tired of the word choice being used to cover up murder. If you believe in life you are considered "anti" if you believe abortion is ok it is dumbed down by calling it choice. You usually have a choice about participating in the activity that creates life to begin with. If you are not mature enough to handle all the possible consequences of that "choice" then use your power to choose then, not after the consequences are dealt with. All this worry about being politically correct and none for the baby. That is what this is, a baby. If you can't handle raising a child with down syndrome then fine, let someone else who would appreciate that life you chose to make have the chance to love that little one. I have an uncle who is disabled mentally and physically. How sad to think he could have been discarded like a piece of trash if he parents had found out early enough that he didn't measure up to their expectations. If you believe in the sanctity of life you are called a "religious fanatic". I am tired of being told something is wrong with standing up for what is right because it makes the "majority" feel uncomfortable. Wrong is wrong. Making it popular will never change that. I stand up for the life of every baby and a woman's right to choose to conceive in the first place. I am not talking about women who are forced into sex, their choice has been taken from them, but they still have a choice to spare the life of their baby even if they choose not to raise him/her. I wish more people would be brave and stop cowering down behind societies politically correct labeling of "choice" in replace of the word murder.

ffer |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

It makes my heart to heavy to think that because a child may not be perfect that a parent would choose to end its life. If your child was in a car accident and you had to take care of them in a disabled condition would you end their life? Just because a baby is inside you doesn't mean it isn't alive and your child. Yes it would not be easy, but if you make the choice to conceive then you have the responsibility to raise the child from the moment of conception. If you feel unable to emotionally or physically raise the child adoption to a person who can is always an option.

TwoLittleGirlsMommy |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

she has her reasons to terminate. . It's her body and she has the choice to do what she thinks is best for her... the child should not grow up in a household where it is not loved.

jack321 |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

Yes, it is possible and I don't fault you for doing it either. It's your choice and I will do the same if need be. People can bash and say what they want, but it is what it is and in the end it's your choice, not theirs

bobbybecky2000 |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

If god saw fit to bless with a child it is gods choice if that child should live or die . Not yours . Plus there is a reason why they came up with adoption if u feel u cant raise a child just cause they have special needs there is someone else out there that can and will by choice and that is god saying that all his children deserve love .

analisamia08 |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

To The Bump: This post needs to be removed. If people want to know about terminating their pregnancy they can google it. This site is here to help pregnant women with their pregnancy and their child. You wouldn't have a post on The Knot about "what if I want a divorce" or something to that effect.

Meg565656 |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

I am appalled by the judgements of some of these women. It's like being surrounded by pro life fanatics. People have a right to choose what is best for them and in my personal opinion it is very selfish to bring a down syndrome baby into the world and not the other way around. All these reactions using words like disgusted and disgusting is just cruel. This site is about information and lending support, not judging and insulting. If people knew they had a baby w/DS much much earlier believe me they'd terminate when it's safer both for the mom ad baby but obviously you can't get these results until later. Anyway don't be cruel and respect people's right to choose! Thank you!

OneThree70 |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

I'm hoping someone will read this soon, I really need some advice. I am nearly 15 weeks pregnant and my baby is very sick. We found out at our 1st trimester screening that she has a significant amount of fluid behind her neck (+12mm), in her brain, around her lungs, and in her abdomen. She also has a heart defect. I have seen 4 different Dr's and all have said that the baby is not viable and a miscarriage is the most likely outcome. I cannot sleep, I cry constantly, this is killing me. To make matters worse my sister is 39 weeks pregnant with a healthy baby she didn't plan though she is super excited about. I have decided that I cannot continue to wait for a M/C and have set up an appointment to terminate. I felt relived about the decision at first but as the days go by I am becoming fearful that this will prevent me from becoming pregnant again. As it's the weekend, I cannot call my Dr. for reassurance and my appointment if 1st thing Monday morning. Please help.

steph7811 |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

To msmoulton FYI: CVS testing is over 99% accurate-not 50%. It's done between 10-12 weeks whereas Amnio is over 15 weeks. I turn 11 weeks on Tuesday and will be having my CVS testing that day. For everyone else I believe EVERY risk should be weighed very thoughtfully BEFORE becoming pregnant. I have 2 boys on the Autism Spectrum which makes the chances for this baby having some form of Autism almost definate. Not to mention @ 38yo there is also the risk for DS. I thought long and hard about this BEFORE becoming pregnant. These children are not circus freaks they're human! The reason they have social obstacles in life is due to lack of education on the "Normal" peoples part. My children are loving, honest, funny and genious in there preferred subjects. There are many DS children that grow up to live perfectly normal idependant lives. Unless it's a life threatening situation, if you're thinking of killing your child because they're not "perfect" you have no right to be pregnant in the first place. It's just selfish.

VickieLynne73 |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

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watson012 |

Q&A: Late pregnancy termination?

How dare someone be so selfish as to end a baby's life simply because they won't be "normal"! This post is outrageous and disturbing. If you're willing to kill a baby over the possibility of DS then you don't even deserve to have a hamster, let alone a child!!!!

MrsWill07 |

late-pregnancy-termination

I just wanted to respond to steph7811, I want you to know that my heart breaks for you and I can't imagine how hard this must be for you. I know it must be so hard just waiting, but I want to ask you to think very carefully before you terminate. I'm not trying to give you false hope, but there is always a chance the doctors were wrong or maybe it isn't as bad as they originally thought. I know a woman who was told she would miscarry and the baby ended up being perfectly healthy and is now a beautiful 18 year old girl. I know that if I chose to terminate, even if it was inevitable that the baby would die, there would always be that "what if" in the back of my mind. I'm so sorry you are going through this and I pray God would give you peace and comfort regardless of your situations outcome.

haydensara |