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Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

How can I avoid tearing during delivery?

Re: How can I avoid tearing during delivery?

Sorry, but there’s no surefire way to prevent tears in the skin surrounding your vagina during delivery. (Yes, ouch.) But, some studies do show that regular perineal massage during the final six weeks can reduce your risk. This technique gently stretches the vaginal opening, making it more elastic and better able to fit around baby's noggin.

To perform the massage yourself, wash your hands and lube up your fingers with KY jelly, vegetable oil or vitamin E. Sit on your bed or on the floor with your knees bent and your legs slightly spread. Place your thumbs three to four centimeters inside your vagina, with the pads of your thumbs pressing on the bottom. Use your thumbs to stretch the vaginal opening downward and to the sides, and hold until it stings slightly. Then gently but firmly massage the bottom half of the vagina, and place a thumb inside and pull outward on the lower rim. Repeat twice a day, and feel free to ask your partner for help! Remember, though: Despite some studies that show that women who massage have fewer tears, many OBs believe it helps very little (or not at all).

Paula Kashtan | May 08 , 2009 4:52 PM

re: Q: Tears During Delivery?

Pushing only when you're told?!? WFT? They DON'T KNOW WHEN YOU SHOULD PUSH!! You should try to be in as upright position as possible. Occasionally take breaks from pushing to give it a little time to stretch and only push when YOU feel the need to. I ignored the nurse telling me to push and did it the way I felt was right and I have no tears.If OBs think this helps very little, why was the OB that was overseeing the residents that were in the room when I was giving birth doing this to help me stretch?

jennisgreat | November 29 , 2007 4:13 PM

re: Q: Tears During Delivery?

Forgot to mention that I did the perineal massage for 5 weeks. I found sitting on the can worked best for me while I was doing it.

jennisgreat | November 29 , 2007 4:17 PM

re: Q: Tears During Delivery?

Yeah, I'm with the above poster- everything I've read says that you should push when you feel the urge and not when your doctor tells you to. Pushing on command is even discouraged by a friend of mine, who is a labour and delivery nurse.

annabelle.27 | March 03 , 2008 11:30 PM

re: Q: Tears during delivery?

I also agree with pp's. The 'purple pushing' method is BAD - nurses, doctors, even your own mother cannot tell you when to push because they cannot FEEL your body and feel what it's telling YOU. Only YOU can listen to your body and it will tell you when to push - it's called 'spontaneous pushing' - you listen to your own body's signals and it will actually eventually even push for you - like a spontaneous, involuntary push. Weird analogy, but it's like when you throw up - you can't control it, your body does. It's like throwing up except your body is throwing 'down' to push the baby out. And no nurse or doctor can really tell when that is happening. AND.. doing this is the best way you can help 'prevent' tearing - letting your body do the work when it needs to instead of being told by someone else.

jholtzman | July 10 , 2008 12:12 PM

re: Q: Tears during delivery?

but if you push too soon you can rupture your cervix - I know someone that happened to

Cytina | August 04 , 2008 4:13 PM

re: Q: Tears during delivery?

I watched my friend deliever and she had no tears but she STOPPED when the midwife said to. I think that is the important part but sorry ladies they can see what is going on down there and there is a point when you need to STOP pushing so you don't tear. I agree 100% to NOT push if you dont feel the need to push.

firsttimemomMT | February 22 , 2009 5:16 PM

re: Q: Tears during delivery?

Every woman is different and a few of my friends who did not have any medication could not feel the urge to push at all, were totally confused and told me that being guided through it was critical. They did not tear at all incidentally.

Sugarpot | July 07 , 2009 5:33 AM

re: Q: Tears during delivery?

Meh. If I tear, I tear. I don't think I'll have time to give myself a vagina massage for the next 5 weeks lol

BuddhaKitty | July 13 , 2009 7:59 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

Oh, and the studies on prenatal perineal massage are completely split down the middle. Exactly half say that this works, and the other half say that it doesn't. What we do know is that perineal massage DURING labor/pushing is significanlty MORE LIKELY to cause you to tear than not doing it. This is because the massage causes fluids to rush to the tissue, causing it to swell. Swollen tissue tears much more easily when faced with pressure (from the baby's head) than non swollen tissues.

mammamayI | July 28 , 2009 12:22 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I'm pretty sure I"m only going to push when I need to, because I think its easier for the baby to come out when he needs to, not when you make him. And as scared to death of tearing (it happens to me A LOT) and I know how much it hurts, I'd so rather having tearing than a C-section if I have a choice. If the baby's coming out the top of my belly instead of the bottom, so be it, but I'd much rather not go through that. My mom is insane and keeps telling me to opt for a C-section "because its over so much quicker! and really, its just a little scar! you won't even notice!" That only works for her because she literally has 7 different surgery scars on her stomach!

TCTF | July 29 , 2009 4:57 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

Having your OB or Midwife guide you during pushing is a good idea because they can tell you when to STOP pushing, even if you have the urge. You should start pushing on your own, but allow an experienced professional can help you pace yourself so your vagina has time to stretch naturally as the baby emerges.

returnhomegnome | August 06 , 2009 12:42 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

Despite the medical traditions, laying down on your back (or even seated at an angle) with your knees in your chest, is probably the worst position you can be in to give birth. It makes you prone to tearing because gravity is dragging the weigh of your baby across your perineum. Not to mention, pushing becomes more laborious because, again, gravity isn't working with you. While there is no way to guarantee you will not tear in any position, delivering in an upright position with your hips and shoulders in better alignment and gravity working in your favor definitely decreases the likelihood of a tear. Midwives have none this for centuries but traditional OBs have developed the supine birth position as the norm because it best serves them. They can stand or sit at the edge of the table and let the baby come to them. Other birth positions, such as squatting, standing, "dangling," kneeling, or using what is called a Dutch birth stool (a u-shaped stool) are all better options for your personal comfort and to help prevent tearing. The trouble is finding an OB who is willing to let you birth in that position. Try talking to your practitioner about it, see how he/she reacts. If you don't get the answer you're looking for, remember you can always deliver your baby with a Certified Nurse Midwife at a local hospital or birth center (typically off-site locations with hospital affiliations). You have choices! Exercise your right to choose!

jillarcangela | August 15 , 2009 7:40 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I want to just deny this is going to happen right now. OMG. I am freaked.

RayJayBaby | August 18 , 2009 1:22 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

i dont have any advice. i just want to thank Buddha Kitty because I just spit up my drink laughing when I read that, and I really needed to be reminded to laugh and not worry about every little thing and drive myself crazy. so thanks for that!

mariah41 | September 09 , 2009 4:58 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

Omg! This sounds so painful. Lol I think i'm going to just push when my body tells me to also instead of listening to the nurses when to push because I do not want to feel that pain omg.

adorablebaby24 | September 16 , 2009 10:24 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

i don't believe there is much you can do about tearing. I've had two babies both well over 8 lbs. I don't even give it a second thought. I tore with both of them and got stitched up 17 stitches with the first and 21 stitches with the second. The healing didn't both me and it was all that painful during labor just felt like a bee sting. Everything down there still works obviously, I'm now preggo with baby number 3.

Corwin79 | September 18 , 2009 1:10 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

There is n way to avoid tearing during a delivery. The only reason women tear during delivery is because shis pushing so much, for the baby to come out.

pnay26 | October 08 , 2009 1:40 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

don't give birth on your back!!

Bellymamadoula | October 12 , 2009 7:27 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I can barely reach my vagina, let alone massage it :)

| October 26 , 2009 6:06 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

How do you do this massage? Never heard of such a thing?

babyblue211281@aol.com | November 03 , 2009 10:38 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

Mowby! I laughed so hard when I read that!!! I'm with ya sister.

HamNCheeze | November 19 , 2009 4:44 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I tore even though I delivered on my hands and knees, pushed with my urges, listened to the midwife when she told me to stop pushing, and used hot compresses on my perinuem during delivery. But if it makes you feel any better, I had no idea that I tore. It's not like you can tell that you're tearing while you're pushing out the baby. Also, my tear healed very easily.

bubba80 | January 14 , 2010 9:08 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I'm a nurse, and I've participated in several deliveries. There are so many factors that play in to "tearing" or not. Listening to the nurse/midwife telling you when to push (if you're not sure when) and when to rest is most beneficial. You cannot start pushing before you're completely dilated (you'll only know this from the nurse) or else you're more likely to tear. Also, another thing to keep in mind is pain meds. Planning on having an epidural? If so, the nurse is going to be telling you when you're having contractions instead of you feeling them on your own; and at the peak of your cnotraction, pushing is most effective. On the other hand, my hospital fully supports the woman to push when she has the urge to when she's fully dilated, because it's a pain and stress reliever to the mom when she feels in control.

MegT21 | January 26 , 2010 8:32 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I am 11 weeks pregnant with my 2nd, and as someone earlier said "if I tear, I tear" which doesn't scare me nearly as much because it did happen with my first labor. About 5 pushes and she was out! I had an epidural and was stitched up while holding my daughter and couldn't even feel it. Honestly I didn't have any problems with healing or pain after either. One thing I can say, it's better to tear yourself then to have to get an episiodomy. Because the healing is much easier and natural when the skin is torn than when it's cut. It's able to bond better... so I guess if you have time for a dialy vaginal massage, have at it... if not "spray a little pam down there" like they said in "baby momma" LOL

funnelcake_fashion | January 27 , 2010 12:51 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I am 17 weeks pregnant, and I am a massage therapist, and I must say it is a little disheartening when I read the skeptism of perineum massage. During pre-labor is best, NOT during hard labor and in between pushes. It does bring too much blood to the area and makes it swell, which in turn can cause tearing. Also using a oil to gently massage the perineum is a good addition. You do not want to put too much pressure, but just give the "taint" a little love! My mother is a massage therapist too and my great grandma was a mid-wife so I learned from the best. But no matter what NEVER let them cut you. Anything your body does natural is better than being manually manipulated!

HecnJean | February 02 , 2010 6:29 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

LOL "spray a little pam down there" i needed that. so if you have an epidural you're less likely to feel it if you tear? does i t take a long time to heal? or does it really depend on how bad you teared and how easily your body recovers? how canyou decrease the amount of time it takes you to heal>

Dannyswifey10 | February 04 , 2010 1:42 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

The epidural helps with the stitches (if needed). With or without pain meds, you are not likely to "feel" the tear over the contractions and stretching during delivery.

corncribgal | February 09 , 2010 3:07 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

We were just talking about tearing and episiotomies at work last week and despite my co-worker saying she didn't feel the tear or the stitches I still stand by my original opinion that "TEAR" IS THE MOST TERRIFYING WORD IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE RIGHT NOW.

hockeybride113 | February 24 , 2010 12:48 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I don't think there is really a sure fire way to prevent yourself from tearing. I ended up having to have an episiotomy when I gave birth to my daughter. She ended up being 8.5lbs when she was born, for me she was a larger baby. No amount of massage or stretching was going to make my body big enough for her to come out sadly. When my OB stitched me back up from it, he actually put in an extra stitch to make sure that as I healed my vaginal opening ended up being close to the original size it was before I had my baby. Also something to remember is while an episiotomy isn't the most enjoyable thing in the world, you actually heal up better that way than from a tear. In the end it is your choice. Good Luck to you :)

Eveah | March 16 , 2010 3:46 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

"Oh, and the studies on prenatal perineal massage are completely split down the middle." Unintentional vagina pun? :)

MassageMomma2010 | March 25 , 2010 4:21 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

With my son I tore, then the doctor cut me, and I still tore again. I could not walk for days and my nickname is Zoro because of the scar. It is the worst feeling in the world. That is the only thing that scares me about another labor. It took so long to heal!

shi1976 | May 14 , 2010 9:06 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I have no personal experience yet, as I'm at 10 wks! I have however been looking forward to being pregnant and having children for ages and have read and paid attention to a lot of information, so here's my humble thoughts on the matter. PATIENCE with your body and pushing when you feel ready. Having a natural birth is more likely to allow you to feel your body and what it needs you to do when. If you listen to that, your chances of tearing should go down significantly. My mom met a nurse while giving birth to one of her 5, who had a really low tear rate with here mother's. My mom asked why. The nurse had been trained in Africa where they know how to wait and let a woman's body do what it is capable of naturally! When the doctor's said push and she knew the mom wasn't ready she'd say something. The Dr. would say he didn't have time to wait, and she'd say "then you don't have time to stitch her back up after". :) That's how my mom tells it!

mommajoy2010 | May 18 , 2010 1:55 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

my son and daughter were the same size at birth with my son i tore straight down and had 2-3 stitches with my daughter i tore in zig zags up and down, i felt everything while the doc stitched my tears that went up it hurt so bad. dont know why it was so much worse with my daughter being they were the same size only difference was the doc did perineal streching with my daughter while i was pushing.

rustykat | May 18 , 2010 2:15 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I am currently 9w and after reading all these posts i am not terrified of the exit! tearing and stitches... not really something i am looking forward to! but thanks to you lovely ladies i did do some research and discovered so many different ways to give birth besides the usually laying on your back that i always see on tv. I think I will bring it up to my doc when I see him next! I hope its not too early for that discussion! so massages.. pushing when u feel ready.. and diff positionings MAY help prevent tearing.. got it! still terrified... i think i will go with the drugs.. at least a lil! *sigh*

beka11 | June 03 , 2010 8:13 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I'm wondering if your body's predisposition to stretch marks would lead to easier tearing. I'm not saying this hopefully because I get stretch marks very easily, but it would make sense to me. If the skin on your belly and breasts cannot handle stretching with the demands of a growing baby, I would think the tissue everywhere on your body would have that same problem. My thougths are, if I tear I tear, I am having a natural birth, so I will follow what my body tells me to do, and if I tear a little and have a wonderful healthy baby, guess what? Stitches work just fine, or so I'm told.

laurelannie | June 25 , 2010 8:15 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

im really scared i just turn 18 and this is my first baby. My body size it pretty small (short) does it make it more likely to tear?

dani514 | June 28 , 2010 9:53 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

Totally agree with the ladies that do not agree with coached pushing. That is only for ladies who are so drugged up they can no longer feel their babies, so the doc and nurses rely on the 100 machines they have you hooked up to to tell them when you are having a contraction, since you gave up your right to feel them when you chose the epidural. Go natural, and you control the pushing. I actually don't like that word - you don't need to "push", your body pushes on auto pilot. Just breath out like you're sending your breath down through your bottom. That way, no tears. Perineal massage does help, especially when you are in labor.

PeaPod30 | July 06 , 2010 9:54 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

perennial stretches a few weeks before due date get you husband or S.O. to stretch you using olive oil or coconut oil or grape seed oil etc. he uses his thumbs to stretch you "down there" you should try to take the stretch as long as possible until you feel a burn that is enough to stop then you try to go a little more the next day so on and so forth... then while you are delivering they "O.B. or midwife" should stretch you down there while the baby is coming. that will definitely help as well. remember though it is MUCH easier to heal from a tear of any degree than to heal from an episiodomy!! good luck to you!! and have an AWESOME wonderful day!

joshandnatalie | July 13 , 2010 11:11 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I'm pretty scared about this too, a midwife told me to check out ACNM.org and do a keyword search for perineum stretch. It is basically a little 2 page flyer that explains how to do the massage yourself OR with the help of your partner.

Goldabraun | August 25 , 2010 7:02 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

Honestly ladies if your going to tear your going to tear. Sometimes you need to listen to the doctor or nurse when they tell you to push because not only can they see what is going on down there but they are also monitoring your child's heartbeat, so when they say you need to push u might want to listen because it might have something to do with your baby's heart rate. I had a horrible tear with Aurora it took them 2 and a half hours to sew me back up, but honestly you feel such relief to have your baby out that you wont even feel it tear. As long as you take care of yourself after you shouldnt have any problems, well at least I didnt have any problems after.

Naylynn384 | September 02 , 2010 11:41 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

Get off your back!!! Of course you'll tear with your legs up by your ears!

Greenvilledoula | September 06 , 2010 11:59 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I delivered 8 days ago and had a medium tear. You don't feel it at all with the epidural. I had no idea it happened until I noticed my doctor stitching me up. When the epidural starting wearing off it burned and they gave me cold compresses and morphine. It was fine. The worst part of recovery so far have been the first time peeing and the first BM. I pushed when they told me to. All I would say is that I felt the pressure of the contraction and was ready to go. Sorry, but this was my first and I completely trusted my doctor and nurses to guide me. My baby's heart rate dropped after the first few pushes and they had to change some things up to get everything going again. I pushed for 30 minutes and out she came!

caseymm | September 08 , 2010 4:45 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I'm with buddhakitty if i tear, i tear. It happens and in my opinion its way better than being cut id imagine that would hurt worse plus its a longer recovery time. I'm not allowing an episiotomy!

amandaG617 | October 01 , 2010 11:19 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

actually while i was in labor, the nurse did the massaging, i wasnt for sure what she was doing because i'd never heard of doing that but it worked, when she would come in to check me she was make sure to stretch the area as well and i didnt tear at all.

allisonporter | October 13 , 2010 4:46 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I cant do perineal massage!!! I CANT REACH MY VAGINA!!!!!!!!

sky0cries0mary | October 14 , 2010 9:56 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

There is a massage that can be good to do. It helps so that you don't tear. Its called Perineal massging.. Also if you cant massage yourself that's what your partner is there for..

Samantha1878 | October 18 , 2010 9:46 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

What the H?! If you don't give birth on your back, what do you do?? I'm not a mom, yet. Reading all this is freaking me out. Lol

CMSnare | October 27 , 2010 6:00 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

It sounds crazy, but my midwife is the most recommended in the area and she has started a trend that is apparently really helping moms not tear during delivery: olive oil. she warms it up first and it helps the skin stretch more comfortably and is supposed to help with the burning sensation too. I thought it sounded weird at first but I've talked to several moms who said it was amazing!

LittleHaliMama | October 28 , 2010 6:24 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

i've already told my doc that if she thinks i'm going to tear, to do an episiotomy... it's a lot easier to sew up a clean, straight cut than a jagged tear, and it will heal better with less scar tissue... hopefully i won't need it, but we shall see... just 4 weeks to go now... oh, and i have been doing the peri massage... a friend of mine did it religiously and had her 10 lb little boy with no tearing... that's proof enough to me that it helps...

kelkelsugar | November 10 , 2010 11:22 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

forgot to mention that i'm doing the peri massage with olive oil... the above poster mentioned it as well... that's what my friend used...

kelkelsugar | November 10 , 2010 11:24 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

to avoid tearing while delivering i asked for an episiotamy they will numb the outside of the vagina with a small needle that wares off verry soon and they do the poke of the needle mid contraction so you dont feel it then they will do a small insition of the vagina you do not feel this!! believe me it is worth it i didnt get it with my first child and got a bad tear from not getting it. with my second child i did get it i still did tear a lil bit but did not feel it because of the numbing meds they used befor the insition!!

destinyhelvik | November 12 , 2010 4:02 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I am just 7 weeks pregnant but I got some great advise from my cousin this week mother of 2 and in her late 30's. She told me that with her 1st baby her doc advised her to rub a fragrance free hypoallergenic lotion for sensitive skin on her vaginal area every day after her shower. she did this religiously and she had zero tearing said she was even out shopping the day after she had the baby. with baby number 2 she wasn't as diligent and tore like crazy had like 17 stitches and so now she swears by the lotion technique. the other thing is to make sure that you get enough exercise in your lower body. the stronger your lower body the better off you are! they don't call it labor for nothing!

clg283 | December 20 , 2010 7:45 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

Ok ladies I am 19wks and 3days and i am terrified! I wanted a natural birth with no medication, not even iv meds but all this talk about possible tearing scares me to death. I am great with pain, but not sure how I will be with this type of pain. I am very thankful for the advice tho about only pushing when you need to. That is something I def. agree with. No one knows your body but you and your baby, so no one knows when you need to push except the one who is pushing and the person in control... The Baby! Lol... I am a first time mom and in great need of guidence on this delivery thing. What are the dos and don'ts?

mmj1010 | January 26 , 2011 7:59 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

mmj1010... I would reccomend lots of education! If you want to go naturally you MUST prepare your whole self...mind, body, and soul! If you are delivering in a hospital it will be more difficult than a birthing center or home birth to go without meds. Learn about your body and just know that your body is made to birth a baby! Women have been doing it since the beginning of the human race. If you tear, you tear! Like most of these women have said, your body is feeling so much and there are so many hormones and emotions going through you that you don't feel the tear itself, you just feel the whole process of birthing a baby. It's most likely not going to be a pleasant sensation, but you will live and in the end you will have a beautiful baby in your arms. Do your research, talk to your ob, and take a class (NOT A HOSPITAL CLASS). There are lots of Doula's and Midwives that offer classes that are still in the Lamaze format but teach you more about natural birthing. Another thing to consider is hiring a Doula. Even if you can't afford a Doula to attend your labor and birth most of them are more than happy to talk to you. Reading real edited and published material is good too, not a bunch of crap on the internet. Most of all, TRUST YOURSELF!!

HLH4 | February 17 , 2011 7:26 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

How come no one has mentioned counter pressure? And p.s. a tear heals much easier than a stitched-up cut does!

MelodyAC | March 17 , 2011 11:02 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I am a few days short of 30 weeks, and I already have a 4 year old daughter who will be 5 next Tuesday. When I had my first daughter, I had her naturally. I was in labor for 2 hours, at home, got to the hospital and had her 20 minutes later. At first I really didn't have the urge to push, but the contractions got so painful that I could barely talk and could only shed quiet tears.lol......The OB told me to push at this point, and I SWEAR it was the BEST feeling in the world! It felt like that one push lasted FOREVER, and I swear dang near all the pain was gone! It also seemed like my body was just pushing on it's own! In the middle of my third push, her head was crowned, and the OB told me to stop, and all I could think was "LADY WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU! I FEEL LIKE THE DAMN TITANIC IS JUST SITTING IN MY VAGINAL OPENING!" The OB did something down there real quick, and told me to start pushing again. With that fourth push, she CAME RIGHT OUT! All I kept asking was "DID I RIP?!" I didn't count her fingers or toes or anything! lol.....I didn't rip though, and I think I would have had a not stop pushing when she told me to. I think it's important to pay attention to what your body is telling you, but at the same time, like someone said above, the person delivering your baby can see what's going on, and it's their job for a reason, so it's important to listen to them too! With this baby, I plan on having a water birth. After deciding this I was told that it would help me not tear.

msmithrich | April 27 , 2011 10:34 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

Preparing your body by eating right, drinking plenty of fluids, perineal massage(using olive oil or veggie oil), squatting frequently and not pushing before your ready are all things that can help prevent tears. Also have your birth attendant give some perineal support during crowing, they can use a warm compress too.

Peacefulbabies | June 15 , 2011 2:18 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I highly recommend reading Ina May Gaskin's Guide to Childbirth, which gives some pointers for avoiding tears, and encourages a more natural birth process. Midwives generally push the massage at home in preparation of labor, and my own does. Tearing is better than an episiotomy. I've heard horror stories of Epi's gone bad... but regardless, women survive it every day... We'll make it first-timers! Stay positive! : )

AutumnPaige22 | July 19 , 2011 4:33 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

The only way to avoid TEARING is cutting, but the muscles are very tense and rigid when they cut and the edges are ragged which causes healing to take longer! Tearing is more natural and the body heals much more quickly, I only had to have one stitch when I tore, but had they cut I would have required more. And yes I tore with each delivery, this will make delivery # 4 still only needed 1 stitch and on the last delivery the tear was so small they didn't have to stitch it at all. He was my smallest baby though :) It is something you are worried about now, but it really isn't a big deal at all. And once you heal neither you nor your partner can tell :)

Holley Day | July 25 , 2011 6:45 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

Natural tearing is better than cutting healing wise- but Tearing/Cutting either way you're going to be split down there most of the time- and its not as bad as it seems. You'll be sore for a few weeks afterwards but Dermoplast spray will help alot. I had it with all 3 of mine and Im planning on using it again this time (lord willing I dont have a c-section). It happens, you wont really notice it, you'll be more focused on pushing you're beautiful bundle out into the world so you can seem him/her!

stepinger2011 | August 10 , 2011 7:20 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

The absolute best way to avoid tearing is to have your OB/Midwife use Extra Virgin Olive oil while you are delivering. They can do a perineal massage while your baby's head is coming out. That worked for me.

nikalina | August 11 , 2011 7:51 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

Hooray! You've made it to the final stage of your pregnancy, labor and childbirth! Your journey's been quite the adventure. Who knew that you'd experience such a gamut of changes and challenges during pregnancy?-Dr. Jerry M. Foster

shantelle1015 | October 24 , 2011 7:03 AM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I am 18wks in my first pregnancy and was worried about tearing as well. I would recommend reading about water births. I have done my research and believe this to be one of the better routes for myself to take while trying to avoid tearing.

jstone928 | November 21 , 2011 1:12 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

I HAVE 3 KIDS AND THIS IS MY FORTH I HAVE NEVER HAD TEARING UNTIL MY THIRD CHILD MY OTHER TWO OB'S DID AN EPISIOTOMY BEFORE DELIVERY AND I HEALED UP FINE BUT WITH MY THIRD BABY I TORE SO BAD I COULD FEEL EVERY STITCH AND FOR ABOUT 2-3 WEEKS I WAS IN SO MUCH PAIN I WAS SCARED OF EVEN GOING TO THE BATHROOM BECAUSE IT WAS SO PAINFUL SO I AM SO TERRIFIED IT WILL HAPPEN AGAIN APPARENTLY MY DOCTOR SAID THE ONLY DO EPISIOTOMY IF ITS NECESSARY IM SO SACRED BECAUSE I ONLY KNW HOW MUCH PAIN I WAS IN COULDNT EVEN WALK.

mariajt2012 | December 02 , 2011 7:29 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

Hi, you can use the metods from parental youga, I atarted to visit classes when I had 5 months and it really helped, you can read the info here https://saymommy.com/mom_1123_advantages-parental-yoga.html I hope it'll help. Good luck!!!

Gloria454 | February 21 , 2012 9:49 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

Sometimes there just is no preventing it, unfortunately. But if you follow some of the advise on here i'm sure you'll be fine :) There;s alot of good advise through this thread!

beautymamaX2 | March 08 , 2012 5:45 PM

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

Ugh, I have tried this perineal massage business. . . maybe if you are some sort of gymnast you can reach the bottom of your vagina with your thumbs at 36 weeks pregnant, but I sure can't. . . I tried to have my husband help me do it, but just wasn't getting it and it's too confusing to explain, then he just wanted to get busy . . .I am just going to be as upright as possible and push with the contractions. Or I could spray some Pam on it, like in Baby Mama :)

TheFeits | March 08 , 2012 8:21 PM

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Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

Q&A: Tearing during delivery?

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