From games everyone will love to tips on registering for baby, here's your guide to planning the perfect baby shower.

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Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

Who traditionally throws a baby shower? Is it really not okay for a family member to host it for me?

Re: Who traditionally throws a baby shower? Is it really not okay for a family member to host it for me?

The Bump Expert

Tradition states that when it comes to throwing a baby shower, those who love you should do the honors. This person could be your best friend from college, a colleague from work, the next-door neighbor... or your sister, sister-in-law, mother, aunt, etc. (In other words -- if a family member offers to throw you a bash, it's more than okay to accept.) A group of friends and/or family may also host your shower. This makes the planning and budget more manageable... and lets more people who love you join in the fun!

From us: While tradition says that relatives shouldn't host your shower, we (and most people we know) think this is pretty outdated. Your aunt or mother may not agree, but this is one "rule" you should be safe to ignore.

Ellie and Melissa

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I'm throwing my own for the most part. I live across the country from where the shower will be and I'm the first in my friends and family to have a baby. My friends are all still in college and working...they're poor and extremely busy. As for family that would throw it, my grandparents would be the only ones and I do not want to put the financial burden on them at all. So as far as planning, sending invites and that sort of thing...I'm taking care of it all! My mother is paying for most of it...food, decorations, favors, etc. I really don't mind, I'm a picky person and love that this shower will be exactly how I want it to be! Lol

AFWife1229 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

We will also be hosting a baby shower. My husband's family and friends are mainly in MN, so we will be celebrating the baby (as long as all goes well) at the same time as his 30th birthday (and his mom's 60th birthday). Our goal was to celebrate, not receive gifts, so we think that by celebrating all 3 at once, we can accomplish that. We may still host one for my family and friends in STL, too, since my best friend is getting married soon after and my family can't really afford to throw one. Again, the goal is to celebrate with the ones we love--and I'm a control feak. ;0)

hispanicqt00 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I'm glad to see that I'm not the only one planning out my own baby shower. Like most people my family and friends do not have the means to afford to do it on their own so I'm covering most the cost and the baby's godmother is helping plan everything out. I actually prefer doing it this way because I love being a part of the organizing the first celebration of the baby!

Kiba_and_moogle |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I am actually hosting my shower as well. I have a close friend that is helping out too though. Plannig is so much fun. I just have to pay the bill as well.

prettycash |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

i don't think i'm going to host a shower either.... after giving it some thought, i have less than 3 friends that i'd truly care to a) spend money on plane tickets/hotel accomodations for; or b) accept gifts from. Even though i have over 1000 "ok" friends, i only talk to these ppl 2-3 times/year and i would feel uncomfortable providing 5-star accommodations for them when i know that a sizable percentage of them are not as wealthy as I and wouldn't be able to purchase adequate gifts. (i'm really bad about hiding my disgusted emotions when i receive a crummy gift) I think it would put them in an awkward situation. Anyways, my question is..... even though I don't like any of the ppl that are "expected" to buy you gifts (aunts, inlaws, mom, grandma, etc) and I am absolutely against spending time with them at a shower, should I send a list of my registry items anyway? On one hand i know they will probably feel obligated to buy something, but on the other hand, i really don't like the idea of having to see them/having to thank them. Also, i've already purchased almost everything i will need for baby. Then, there's also the issue of acquaintences/my employees asking when the shower is or if someone's throwing me one. I've been telling them that i don't have enough friends to have a shower... but they react awkwardly since they know i'm somewhat of a socialite. I'm assuming he/she is hurt that i would not consider him/her a friend? But its true, what can i say? anyways, the whole topic of a shower has generally been an awkward topic. Advise, please!

dianadoyle88 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My advice to you would be not to throw a shower at all. If people end up buying you things that you don't want then take them to a consignment store or donate them. There are a lot of people out there who could benefit from your "crummy gifts".

kimdquin |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I'm thinking of throwing my own shower. My parents are unable to travel and live far away and so does my sister and brother although my sister will be helping me after baby arrives. I'll have it in my home and keep it as a brunch. I most likely will ask a friend to help with all the prep work but think it would be a good idea since it's our first baby:) I need stuff:)

Lauraely1 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My son came into our family first and even though my mother wanted to throw my shower and I accepted she isnt the greatest hostess so I ended up running the show. Two years later A good friend of my husband and mine has offered to host a shower if we want to have one (we think this is a girl) Some family may have good intentions but at the same time those of you taking into account their means and how precious time is these days I think are on the right track. I was so tired and irritated by the end I would have rather thrown it myself and just been in control of the situation! :D

DaniLorello |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I'm expecting my 3rd child, 7 years after my last. I was not planning another child, but God has his own plans. Anyway, this is my BFs first and his sister-in-law wanted us to have a shower, after much arguement from me (as I've never had a shower), I agreed. The invites went out and the shower is this Sunday. There is nothing planned, no games, favors, prizes... Now, I'm frustrated trying to get all this together. She didn't have the financial means for a shower... and I don't either, but I can't just let friends and relatives come with gifts for our little one, with no small thank you in return. I'm wishing I had just gotten my way, with no shower at all. If anyone wanted to get something for bun, they would have and all I'd have to do is send thank you cards....

red139 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My husband and I are having a couples shower and my parents are hosting it. We are going to do a cook out and keep things really casual.

agmcminn |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My husband is in the Navy and we live in Hawaii and all my family lives on the mainland, mostly in the Chicago area. My mom and aunts are going to throw a family shower in Illinois. We are going to set up computers and I am going to the shower via Skype!! That way my family can celebrate the newest addition AND I will get to be a part of the party! :) In our family, the tradition has always been that the mom and aunts host a party for the rest of the family for weddings and babies.

Eilatanmi |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My husband is in the Navy so we are actually having 3 different showers. One my family is putting on in New York, one my work is putting on, and the 3rd we are putting on for all of our friends down here.

snomobug |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I am throwing my own as well. My family told me they have no time to help me plan, Daddy's family does not much like me or the fact that we decided to keep our little surprise baby so they have been the opposite of helpful and supportive, and my close friends who would be willing to throw the whole shebang are too far away to do me the honor. Glad to know it's a little more acceptable to do it this way and that I don't have to feel so bad about taking the party planning burden on myself.

KatieGraceB |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I am throwing my own as well. It's my first baby and I want the shower a certain way.My best friend and some close family members are helping me.

msaquarius909 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My sister-in-law is throwing my baby shower. She has put a ton of money and effort into it and I feel like I should get her some sort of present for everything she has done. Does anyone know if this is something normal or should I just take her out to lunch as a thank you?

mamainseptember |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I was getting worried before I read all of these responses because we were planning on throwing our own (my mom would be the "hostess" but we were going to pay for everything and do most of the planning). A few of the girls from work are going to throw me one too but for family and friends I think we are going to do most of it.

JessicaW0817 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I was getting worried myself that I was planning almost everything even though some friends and my sister volunteered- they also aren't so good at planning and I feel awful having to let them pay. So I'm running the show with some support. My co workers want to give me a shower too but i'll let them take care of that if they insist, but if that doesn't work out, its ok, no pressure :)

rlyntolentino |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I'll be planning the shower, with help from my sister-in-law. She planned my bridal shower for me & was so great! I don't want to ask her to fully plan this one because she's a working single mom & I don't want to burden her. I'll just ask her to collect RSVP's & help decorate.

dancinggirl77 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

Well, I'm more traditional and I feel someone else should throw the baby shower so my step mom will be throwing mine and I'm so excited because I've thrown at least 3 of my friends showers and now its my turn to just sit back and have fun instead of worrying about if everything is going smoothly and how I want it.

UniqueParemt |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I am so excited... My 8th GrandBaby... the other families 1st... So, BOTH GRANDMAS are hosting this Baby Shower... I get to share my experience while enjoying her Excitement of the other Grandmas 1st time... I get to share knowledge of wonderful and Fun games...I am providing the the plates, cups, decor and such things like the games and prizes and she is providing the food and cake. We both are making the Guest list so that friends and family from BOTH sides are invited...

babynana8 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My babyshower is going to be this Sunday and me and the babies dad will be paying for most of it with a little help from some of my closest friends. We will be paying for most of the big ticket stuff like the hall and I prefer being involved in the planning as well as I want things my way and my friends do not know all of the babies dad family.

ckrystal26 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I think the baby shower should be a special day that someone else plans for you. I knew few people will offer to host mine, I have a lot of friends and is my 1st baby, the problem: I'm popular between my friends for my great parties and I'd like my baby shower to be as or more special, so even when I don't completely agree I was going to plan it myself, plus I didn't want to be picky and make someone spend a lot of money to achieve the type of shower I want, but my MIL's bestfriend offered to throw the shower for me the day after we told our family, now I don't know what to say, her style and mine are completely different.

sramosg |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My mom and mother-in-law are going to pay for mine, but I'll be doing most of the planning.

thewildboo |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I am planning my own shower. This is our thrid, and last child, so the shower is going to be huge and done how I want it done. This means I have to pay for most of it, but I am ok with that. I have a hard time with things planned by other people, because I have high expectations...LOL...I know this all makes me sound conceited and unappreciative....trust me, I am not....I just want the last one to be what I want.....not what someone else wants.

mhnurse02 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

mother and mother in law - together

mommy20052011 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

my mother is not the best party planner (she made my bridal shower a nightmare for my girls!) but she is INSISTING that she throw a surprise shower for me. the issue i'm running into is that my husband and i would like to throw a "shower optional" party and invite our friends to celebrate many of them have told us that they'd like to gte us a gift and we figured this would be a great chance to just get together and enjoy everyone's excitement. i'm not sure if my mother is inviting my friends, or what she is doing! she won't tell me or the hubby anything. i have no idea how to approach this with her. everytime i try she tells me that it's none of my business and that she can handle planning a party...

szimmerman06 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I would like to have someone throw a shower for me, but no one has mentioned anything to me and I am in my 2nd tri now. So I'm thinking I will plan a casual BBQ style shower at my house in late May(i will be 30w). I figure if someone does wind up surprising me with a shower..the more the merrier! and if not I have one planned and ready to go.

gwenathan |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

Several ladies at my church have already approached me and asked my permission to plan a baby shower on my behalf. I talked it over with my mother before they asked about it, and she said that "traditionally" it was tacky for the family of the expectant mother to ask others for gifts so she did not really want to plan or host a shower. My cousin is also going to be planning and hosting another shower after the one given by the ladies at church.

BIGGSBABYGIRL |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

my roommate and other roommates girlfriend but friends are willing to help

angez |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I have 5 children and one on the way,one of which is my daughter who is 12. My daughter wanted to give me a shower,so we planned it everything turned out very well.She was very excited!!!! and i thought it was very sweet of her!! (Love you Lauren)

rochieda6 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I don't know about everyone else but the whole baby shower thing has really stressed myself and my partner out! This has a lot to due with the fact that one side of the family is huge and the other is not. Unfortunately, some feelings were hurt in the planning because a best friend of mine planned the shower with help from me because the larger side of the family were dragging their feet. I'm so excited for the shower but I also can't wait for it to be over!

mommymichelle2011 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

We will be having 3 showers! We are miitary stationed in Arkansas and our family lives in 2 different cities 3 hours apart so we will have one with my family, one with his and then one in Arkansas with our church family. I have a feeling I will be doing a lot of the planning because that's just how I am.

abkafer |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I'm thorowing my own. Familly members are helping out a little bit but I've handled pretty much everything and the bill.

tieeta |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I'm more of a traditionalist... My MOH/best friend lives 600 miles away, so since she's not local, my mom will be handling it. I did some research to assist her in finding a venue - pricing, packages, etc since her home can't accomodate a large number of people. Everything is in her hands. It's her first grandchild so she's completely excited. I don't want to know anything about it - theme, date, etc. My office will throw a small one for me at some point. My only request was that instead of a cake, we have cupcakes from my favorite gourmet cupcake shop.

BoxerMomma24 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I'm planning my own mainly because I am a big control freak and I want to make sure nothing tacky or cliché is planned. I am 11 weeks only but by planning it from now I can explain things to my husband who will make sure my likes and wishes are met in case I can't get too involved then. :)

DizzyMissLizzie |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

We are adopting for the second time. Our son is 5 now. Our little addition is a girl so we have absolutely NO girly things let alone my son's crib-I loaned it out and I can't ask for it back...lol...and for as many people who want to come to the shower, I hate to ask someone to throw us one as it may get pretty pricey so we are throwing our own shower. We have access to a beautiful venue in our Clubhouse in the Community we live in so that is easy there....and can hold all the guests that have said they want to come....so I'm glad to see I'm not the only one throwing my own shower.....my parents live out of state and unfortunately, my MIL hates me so I can't rely on her stepping up....lol

MommieMeyers |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I'm so glad to hear that i won't be the only one planning their own shower. After reading from others it was "tacky" i needed reassurance there wasn't anything wrong with wanting things to do your way for you and baby's special day. This is my first child, and most of my friends have older children with financial burdens that i didn't want to place my expectations on. I am taking care of the planning and costs, but i will be asking them for help with running the games, etc. And since i'm planning my own, it will give me more freedom on who can be invited.

dovedove |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I have about 3 very close friends who are not equally close to eachother. I wouldn't expect any of the three of them (all newly weds) to foot the bill for my shower. I figure my mom and I can plan and orginize the shower that way my friends can have money to spend on gifts and not the silly things that are involved in a shower. My MOH just had her second child and just got married 9 months ago (they started trying right away) and I could never ask her to do this when I couldn't even make it to her shower. I think it will be so much easier if I can have the control of when and where and what we do since I will be the only one who can gauge what I can handle.

stacylash |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I'm torn, I've would really like someone to host a shower, but my two closet friends live hours away, one expected her own little one very soon. I don't want to ask someone to host it and really don't have anyone I am close to where I live that I think would offer. With my schedule, I need to start planning soon...especially since the 'right' time falls smack dab in the middle of the holidays. I have few weekends open and I really want my mom to attend, but she needs over a months notice for work. I have two 'maybe' girl friends who I think might host, but neither has said anything and I feel weird asking. Is it rude to ask?

ajans43 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

this was RELLY what i needed to read! my sister wants to plain the shower but cant afford to throw it, and the rest of my family (including my husbands) cant do it by themselves. this is my 2nd child and i DIDNT get a shower with him...this time i kinda wanna do it "big". so im gonna pay for what i can and see what some of my family can chip in and hope all goes well :)

svaniah |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My mom is throwing mine for me and planning everything down to the date, I have no idea when it will be or where so its all a surprise which is amazing cause i love surprises ;)

heatherbby14 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My mother & mother-in-law are hosting our shower. We have a 12 year old daughter (same father- my husband) and my mother hosted a shower for her. I didn't feel comfortable with another one, but they are insisting, as are all of our friends and family. They WANT to celebrate our new addition, we've waited a long time for him! Plus, it's been more than a decade, and it's a boy- we have a daughter already. So, I'm going to go for it- everyone really wants to do it for us :) I feel very blessed!

JohannaMama |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My family and in-laws are throwing me a shower on seperate days.

barraganrios |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

Ok, I guess I'm an odd ball on these kinda of things. When shower time rolls around I'm sure three will be thrown for me (i will be huge and I don't want to run the show, I like to sit back and enjoy my time). I'm not a control freak and I don't mind if it is the norm. I don't mind pink frosted cake and weird/usual games. I'm just happy people have gathers in my baby's honor and to help us get on our feet so the child has a smooth beginning in to the world. Hmmm. I won't throw a shower for me, even if no else wanted to/could do it.

meganthechef |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I am planning my own shower too at my house, I will combine it together with my birthday party too, so I think it will be more like a regular get together but with a baby theme and baby shower games and presents. I thought it would be a good idea, because I like to be in control of all planning and organizing

taraptishka |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I am definitely not going to throw my own baby shower. I know girls whose moms threw it for them and they put up the invitation themselves on Facebook so it kind of looked like they/the family were asking for gifts. If nobody wants to give me a shower I just won't have one I guess. My mom wanted to do it but I already told her no.

spazzmommy |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I have already started planning the type of shower I would want, and I'm not even pregnant yet (although I'm feeling some symptoms =D). I've thrown baby showers a couple times. As for mine, I think I'm too particular about how I like things and part of the planning is the funnest part. With that being said, I believe I will be throwing my own. If people want to help out they are more then welcome, but I have a pretty good idea with what I want and ways I can DIY and keep it affordable. Pinterest.com has become one of my best friends for that reason!

ajeitner |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My husband and I are in a very sticky situation. His sister has offered to throw us a shower but his mom doesn't think she should. I have family about 2 hours away that I know would come up here for it but I also know my in-laws aren't too organized. We used to live by my family so our friend has offered to throw a shower for our friends down there. Then my immediate family (mom, sisters, best friend and her family) are all 500 miles away. My husband and I go to visit often so I am expected to go there for another shower. To add to all this I am high risk and my travel will be restricted at about 30 weeks - right around the time my younger sister is expecting her second baby. So, my mom is hesitant about throwing us a shower because she doesn't think she can do both. Kinda crappy if you ask me considering this is our first but if my mom backs out my best friend and her family have already said they would throw us one. So, for us we have to have very early showers out of town and I am already exhausted thinking about being the center of attention at 3 showers! But we need stuff lol and everyone is pretty excited for us because we were having a lot of problems getting pregnant. Just glad we are doing everyone showers - not just girls!

bandyrudolph |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I am helping a close family friend and my mother plan a shower for my husband and me. It was a little disappointing that my sisters-in-law didn't offer, but after getting started on the planning it seems like it will be a good bit of fun!

crashley79 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My two best friends hosted my baby shower and invited the ladies in my family and a few other close friends

abugny |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

We hosted our own shower. Co-ed, family, friends, kids all together in our backyard. After too many people giving that "Oh I'd love to throw you a party" line and never following through, we took it upon ourselves. It was just how we hoped it'd be and enjoyed celebrating with the people we love most all in the same place! And the guys even enjoyed themselves! (We did have the tv on, inside for the occasional football score check). We did an easy lunch buffet, a dessert table and a few non-traditional games. I recommend it to anyone!

moran17 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

Mostly, Parents will host the baby shower!!

ferozkhan |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I'm waiting to see what life brings.. My in-laws threw mine for our son. But they are gong through so much this year that I won't even let them think about it, of curse they haven't even mentioned it either. My church also threw me a small one with him too. S far nothing has been said for this 2nd one... If I'm having another boy I'll be just asking for diapers, formula, and bottles. Other then that I might end up throwing myself one. Unless somebody offers to do one for me. I don't have many friends and family so all what life brings to me...

Daltongang4 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I'm throwing my own baby shower too! My really good friend is helping me plan it and we are doing it together. My husband and I are paying for everything. I also wasn't sure if it was okay to plan my own baby shower but everyone keeps asking me to invite them to our baby shower. So I decided to just have one and have a good time. This is our first child and we are pretty excited. We have bought pretty much everything we need but people still want to come together to celebrate with us. So I'm happy to share our joy and party. The gifts are not important. Sometimes its not about etiquette and doing things the way other people say you should do them. Its about coming together and being thankful for Gods many blessings. Regardless of who comes or doesn't we will be happy and thankful to share time with good family and friends.

retta123 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I am overall planning my own shower, but my Mom, Aunt, Sister and really good girlfriend are also going to help. My mom feels like she should be the one planning it but first we dont see eye to eye on decorating/catering ANY event, so there is no way she is taking over. Second, I want things to match and coordinate. I did let them do my bridal shower and there were some things I would have not done or done completely different. This is the first baby and I want things to be right.

nherring |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I decided I am going to be hosting my shower. While my sisters and mom will be helping, I'm not really a shower person and I decided to have more of an open house shower. I also figured it'd be better for me to host, my family has not yet met my boyfriends family, this way I'll be the neutral party and I feel things will go more smoothly.

babybird43 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

True

TalleyAW |

who-hosts-baby-shower

Best friend charnese, mama, grandma

Devons mom |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

"dianadoyle88" You are incredible. I agree that you definitely should NOT have a shower. Even if someone were to offer to throw you one, which with your selfish personality I highly doubt, I would still refuse. Perhaps, just stick with the story that there is just really not a lot that you need, and that you're just too busy? I wouldn't recommend that you state that you just have too much money and probably wouldn't like the thoughtful gifts anyway. There are so many Mothers out there that have no choice but to take advantage of consignment sales and hand-me-downs, and your "crummy" gifts would be welcomed with open arms. Shame on you.

jchappeljones |

who-hosts-baby-shower

I'm super blessed! My baby's Godmother offered to pay and get me a party planner and my bff is traveling from out of town to host. I know I'm going to get great gifts from my friends & family and with a party planner, I have no stress! Blessed!!!

SuperMommiBerni |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

After hearing this I am feeling so blessed to have a best friend who is kind enough to be planning what is sure to be a memorable shower for me. She asks what I like and dont, but I am letting her take care of it because I am lucky enough to have been raised by parents who taught me to appreciate things rather than obsess about anything that might not be exactly what I would have done.

aduvall79 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My sister offered to throw me a shower, and I accepted but also told her that I would like to be involved in the planning. I have a lot of ideas for it and want to have it in my home, so I feel that it will be okay for me to me involved. And if I'm being perfectly honest, she hosted my bridal shower, and it was almost a disaster. She changed the date three times, and many of the people who wanted to be there couldn't because they were only given a week's notice. Most of my family and friends live out of town and need more of a heads up than that. My sister is creative and has great ideas, but organizing is not her thing. Is it wrong for me to want to step in and be a part of the planning?

deejohn2012 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My two sisters are hosting me in Indiana, where were from but I live in Georgia. lol. My younger sister is the brains and creative side to this whole thing. To be perfectly honest I didn't even want a baby shower. But with Pinterest, my sister has applied a lot of awesome ideas that won't financially hurt her. she is only 21 so money isn't always available. My sister is very secretive, she will reandomly call and ask color questions for a boy or a girl (since we still dont know yet) and then flavors of cake, types of food I want... I have donated $400.00 to the shower to help he out, and mother and older sister are helping the best they can. I think family is way better than friends. i love my best friend to death, but I feel it is a very intimate time and I couldn't imagine any other person(s) planning this other than my sister.

mahnnis |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My Mom and My Mother in Law are planning my Baby Shower.

DueInJuly2013 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I find it kind of horrifying that people would throw themselves a shower. The gift of someone throwing you a party is just that - a gift. It seems very wrong to refuse to allow someone to throw you a shower. If a person honestly wants to go to the trouble of hosting, then it's **so inappropriate** to try to control it. It's the thought that counts... no one "deserves" a shower that conforms exactly to their expectations. If you refuse to allow someone to give you this gift, you will hurt people's feelings. This type of wound is one that will last and last and last....is it really worth all that for a car seat and stroller? I don't think it's cool to give yourself a shower either. The term "shower" comes from the idea that the friends "shower" the mother-to-be with gifts.

eolbricht |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

Also- and as for who *should* throw it: it is really not up to the mother. Truly - stay out of it except to the extent that you give out phone numbers so that different people who have offered can get in touch with each other. Or for example, if there are multiple offers and one friend already hosted your wedding shower, you can help by explaining to that friend that it might be someone else's turn.( I have seen situations where the best friend ran the wedding shower, the bachelorette party, the rehearsal dinner and the wedding and other friends and family of the groom have just been devastated and so hurt. Other than that, just stay out it - its not your job to decide what people should do for you or give you.

eolbricht |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

To the woman who wondered if it's OK to ask someone to host it: yes, it is. Sometimes people assume that someone else is already signed up to do it. So if you have a friend or family member that you think might do it, it is perfectly appropriate to ask. A lot of people would be thrilled to be asked!! Ditto for the lady who said that multiple people requested to be invited to her shower so she decided to throw her own. No, no, no. These people are assuming that someone is throwing you one, and/or testing the waters to see if it is already organized before offering! The proper response here is, "If someone offers to throw me shower, I'll definitely ask that your name be on the guest list." This way the word gets out that that the privilege of hosting is still available and soon enough someone will offer!!!

eolbricht |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

So glad to hear I'm not the only one planning their own shower. Originally my best friend was going to throw it for me but she found out after the location had been reserved and the date had been set that she was going to have to go on a business trip. :-( Unfortunately, no one else has stepped up to take the reins and I don't think I should have to go without a shower because of that reason so I'm doing it myself. We're paying for all the food, activities, games, and location so it's not like the guests aren't getting something in return. I figure, people throw kids birthday parties all the time and people invited are expected to bring gifts so why should this be any different? We're just throwing a PRE-birthday party. :-) And an added bonus is things will be exactly the way that I want them.

victizzle |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I'll be throwing our own couples shower for our friends, and I had to ask my mom to host a family shower - a little embarrassing to ask, in my opinion. My husband and I are broke because we're both still in college, so if it seems to our guests as if we're begging for gifts... well, we are. It's our first baby, so it's no surprise. I thought about asking a friend to host, but I feel like that might be even more tacky. Not to mention, my "close girl friends" list is, like... 0. I'm in nursing school, and social time isn't exactly on my to-do list. I felt awkward about it at first, but I'm glad these silly traditions are changing - it's really no different than hosting your own birthday. Except this is a party for your baby, not you!

BerryBabies13 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

i honestly have no idea who will be throwing me a shower. i recently moved cross-country away from friends and family. way too far away to anyone to come here, and if i went home for a shower i would have to ship everything back and that doesnt make sense. I havent made a lot of close friends here yet either though, at least not close enough to have one of them host a shower for me. Plus we live in a very small apartment that isnt really ideal for having lots of people over. my husband and i may just end up having to buy mostly everything for the baby ourselves and if friends or family give us stuff that's nice but isnt expected. not really sure what else to do at this point. any ideas?

mikesbride12 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

sister

michaleenm |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My mom, sister and 3 of my closest friends are organizing my shower. I am so grateful for that! Although I love planning and organizing parties and get-togethers, I just don't have the time or the energy for that matter! They all know me really well, so they know what I will like. Now it's up to me to keep the guest list down to less than 100 people. :-)

Nene49 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

A close female family member like a sister or mother, but some people have lots of smaller showers instead of one big one and in that case it could be a coworker or a best friend.

audreyedith |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I am the owner of a beautiful peruvian restaurant called MPP Brickell in Miami,fl I wanted to offer the venue for you to throw your baby shower or bridal showers etc. If interested please contact me to andrea@zayasmarketing.com Thank you

dreak88 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

hubby and i are probably going to throw our own shower. it'll most likely be just a normal family/friends get-together at a local park or community center. all that matters to us is that we can celebrate baby's pre-birthday together.

msstephaniejoy |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I'll end up having three showers altogether; one that my mom and aunt are holding (our family and friends are a pretty large group), one that my MIL will host (that side is extremely religious so wouldnt mesh well with my side) and one my hubby and I will have with our close friends. I don't do well in huge groups so this works out great for my anxiety too!

MrsGillen29 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I really don't think it should matter. However, in my case someone told me they were going to do it when I had 3 other people who also wanted to throw me one so they all did it together. While that helped out on cost, it was chaotic. I don't suggest it. Just make sure that it is someone who is going to work with you and will do things that you want to do and not make it too overwhelming.

darcimae1503 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I had a friend "scold" me because I hadn't had my baby shower at 28 wks. I'm now 32 weeks, this is my 3rd but my youngest is almost 16 so I have nothing. Literally, my son and I share a room at my parents house, so when someone had asked me if I was going to have a baby shower, my mom immediately chimed in "NO!" That was my clue she wasn't going to want me having people at her house celebrating the baby. All my family lives in Washington (we're in Cali), I have maybe 2 friends that I can actually call friends, and then my baby's dad's family who live 50 miles away. So what I did was set up an "online baby shower" through Facebook. I listed which registries I belonged too, where they could have the gifts shipped too, what I was having and when I was due. I sent invites to all my family and high school friends. I'll keep you posted as to how successful this was.

sinnee |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I am 24 weeks tomorrow, and last sunday i moved away from all of my friends and family, dont know what to do or how to do a baby shower since my mothers family and my fathers family dont really get along, it took me to plan my wedding alone with no help and then everyone to fuss about it! I swear i dont need that stress with a baby on the way! What should i do?!?!?!? my husbands family live in NJ and RI and wouldnt even come down for our wedding i dont know if i should invite them for a baby shower or not either! this is all so confusing!

newfamilyof3 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

The Paternal/GranMother

granma2014 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

eolbricht, I liked everything you had to say and I agree with you wholeheartedly.I have a question for you: I have a couple close friends who offered to throw me shower, but they don't have money and I don't think they actually want to, they have just been hinted to by others that they should. I told them that I don't want a shower, even though I do because I can tell their hearts are not in it, just obligation. One of my friends insisted on throwing me one, but then said.. ok, where do you want it? who do you want to come? when do you want it? what kind do you want? etc... so they are pretty much badgering me for every detail anyway (once again, I'm not really sure they want to do this). Is it bad of me to go ahead a plan it since she's asking me everything anyway and then just let her deal with invites/rsvps and decorations? plus then it's not a financial burden on her. (she hasn't told me it would be, but I know she's talked to other friends about it)

crabil |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

The two grandmothers are co-hosting my shower and I am thrilled! The old traditions are sometimes just not quite the rule any longer.

Steph10210 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My husband is throwing me a shower. It's essentially just going to be a fall bbq type fling at our house with beers and shower gifts. We are military in CO and our families are in VA. All of our friends live back east as well so I just have a couple coworkers coming. My husband wanted me to have a shower since it's our first. He's a sweetheart and knew it just wasn't going to be possible for distant family and friends to get involved, so he took it upon himself. He invited a lot of his coworkers since they were bugging him about "when's the shower??" It will have couples and their kids, so no pressure kind of evening.

kathleenreba |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My sister and mother-in-law are going to be planning mine. Not sure who's paying for it yet....

trendydays |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

My mom & I are doing it together! This is my first child so its all so new to me.....but my mother-in-law had an issue with me helping plan my shower!!?? I'm sorry, but I will be the first to admit that I'm picky & want things to be done a certain way:)

DesPres9410 |

Q&A: Who hosts baby shower?

I am pregnant with my first baby. I want a co-ed party with all of our friends and family. My parents will probably host it and my friends and I will do the planning, decorations, invitations, etc. I am looking forward to that stuff and don't want others to have all of the fun!

rnhay |