From games everyone will love to tips on registering for baby, here's your guide to planning the perfect baby shower.

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Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

How long can I reasonably wait to send thank-you notes for gifts?

Re: How long can I reasonably wait to send thank-you notes for gifts?

The Bump Expert

You'll probably be very busy (and exhausted) in the weeks before and after baby arrives, and your family and friends are sure to understand. Still, it’s best to send out those thank-you notes asap. Try to send a thank-you for shower presents and other pre-baby gifts before the big day, if possible. (We know it’s tough, but it’ll be easier now than when you’re changing diapers and waking up at all hours.)

For the gifts that you receive after delivery (and the leftovers from beforehand), shoot for getting notes in the mail by the time baby is two months old. And, if you don’t make the deadline, don’t convince yourself that you’ve waited too long. The rule here is the same as with wedding gifts -- it's never too late to show gratitude.

Erin Walters

re: Q: Thank-you note timing?

I handed my MIL a thank you note three weeks after my first baby shower. Her comment was "I thought these were supposed to be done within two weeks".....She was the only one to make a comment....surprise surprise.

youngmomma |

re: Q: Thank-you note timing?

LOL youngmomma--a good reason to send thank-you notes in the mail!

miss_mitzi |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I would say 1 to 2 weeks after...some people get wierd about these type of things....

fahrahwalicke |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I addressed and stamped all the envelopes before the shower so I just had to write the notes and put them in the mail. However, there is another shower being planned for after the baby arrives....I may not be as ambitious then!

amandabrideoct2008 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I have been to a couple of showers, one of which I hosted, and the Thank You notes are provided to the mommy to be with addresses already on them and never received any note of gratitude from EITHER of the girls. I don't expect it witihin a certain time but I do think it is important to at least show some appreciation for the people who took the time and money to show their love and support for you. Anyone else get a little peeved about this?

AGSkelton |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

P.S. One of the "babies is in 1st grade this year and the other is about 4 months old now.

AGSkelton |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I'm 7 weeks pregnant with my first but excited about what is to come. I know for me I'll have to do them right away or they may never get done. I've been married 3 years and some shower thanks you's never even got finished let alone wedding thank you's. My mom was less than happy about that!

amiquette |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

The best thank you writing rule is that nothing come out of the package until its thank you note it sent! That will be the encouragement you need to get it done!

acrlyhed |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I had my shower on Sunday and Monday night I addressed the envelopes. I'm going out tonight, but plan to write the notes Wednesday to be mailed Thursday. I was very bad w/ my wedding notes, so I'm trying to make up for it now!

missypg |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

At the last baby shower I attended, we were handed out coloured envelopes to write our names and address. These were used for drawing the door prize and the mom-to-be had one less thing to do.

AndreaElizabeth |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

My shower is in 2 weekends and I got an idea from ladies on here to make my own thank you notes with an ADORABLE poem on them that is supposed to be "from the baby" I went to staples and had the poem put on note cards and signed them from "Olivia Jade" and I am planning on handing these out at the baby shower. They say thank you for the gift you brought and that my family appreciates the thought. This idea was wonderful considering we are on a very tight budget & helps save time!

asmalls86 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

"I'm really glad that you could come And help surprise my mother sit down, relax, enjoy yourselves and chat with one another Sorry I can't be with you to join in Mommy's shower But I'm very busy you see I'm growing more each hour Though I'm not there to thank you for the lovely gifts you've brought my family is grateful we appreciate the thought I'll be arriving shortly and I'm as happy as can be so, after I've been home awhile please come and visit me!" Lots of Love, Olivia Jade (The poem!)

asmalls86 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I had more people at my first shower for my son than my wedding... no lie over 100 people in my mothers house. But I was so appreciative that my friends and family were so happy to celebrate and prepare us so I enlisted my hubby he wrote to his friends and family from us and me to mine from us we put on a movie (knocked up lol) and got them all done before the baby got there. My shower was on Aug 30th and I delivered Sept 12th ENLIST YOUR MEN AND GET THEM DONE!

DaniLorello |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I've been to showers where they have everyone write their name and address on an envelope and then they collect them and do draws for prizes. That way, your envelopes are addressed and everyone's name is spelled properly.

Savoy1984 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

About 9 years ago, my mother sent a gift with me from her, to a shower I was attending for a friend of mine. My friend never sent her Thank You card. My Mother remembers that! Everytime I mention the girl's name she makes a comment about a Thank You card. I write mine out within days of receiving the gift!

Christine610 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I truly believe that Thank You notes are a wonderful way to show gratitude, but I do not understand why people get so bent out of shape about them. I went to a baby shower for a friend of mine last year, she was so tired and exhausted leading up to the birth and just after that she never got around to sending all of them. I completely understood! Like I said great gesture, nice idea... but WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE to get them done during such a busy and exhausting time!

kmhagan |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I loved the idea about doing the peom from the baby. I plan on using that but I think I'm going to mail them out after the shower. I also like the idea of having everyone put their name and address on the envelope as a way to do door prizes. Thank you all for the wonderful ideas.

bekah22587@hotmail.com |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I would say try to get them out as soon as you can (but later is always better than never!). I never got a thank you card from my SIL from either of her wedding showers, her wedding or either of her baby showers (one of them which I hosted!) - baby is now 9 months old

springbride508 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I am planning on repeating my plan from my bridal showers. We had the guests write their name and address on the envelope, so all I had to do was write the thank you note and stick on the stamp. Finding the address is always the part I hated most!

sstier24 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

Yes this is such an exhausting time. However if you take some time before the shower to "plan" your thank yous they can be as fun as the shower. I always plan them ahead of time. For example. My shower is June 5 and we're getting maternity photos done on the 11th at picture people. I'm taking my photo disc straight from them to target to print picture thank yous. I'm also going to hand write a personal note to each guest and include it in the envelope. I'm going to write the personal notes during the week gap between the shower and photo session so everything will be ready to go out that day. It's really exciting if you get into it. I find it funny that noone has mentioned you can do these while relaxing in bed. lol. Grab a cup of tea, your thank-you's and snuggle in bed and have some relax time while writting them. This doesn't have to be cumbersome. Have fun and congrats to everyone.

onlyyou06 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I had my baby shower very end of March and got all of the thank you notes out by 1st week of May. A little over a month I feel is completely acceptable. I hand wrote out a pretty lengthy thank you to everyone so when doing that, I think that amount of time is fine.

larasmaid |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

If you're having a late shower, if possible why not send out thank you's right after baby is born. This way you can add baby's picture as if he/she is thanking the person. I think people would be more forgiving and you'd kill 2 birds with 1 stone.

sabbyhuck |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

Depending on the size of your shower, I think it's appropriate to send notes within 1 to 2 weeks of the shower. I had about 40 thank yous to write and had them done within a week. The sooner you write them, the shorter they can be! It's hard to convince someone that you love that cute onesie as much if you wait two months to write the thank you! Also, I know I never forget when I don't receive a thank you from someone. It's so rude! It would be one thing if there was a medical issue or something, but there are some people I don't even want to give presents to anymore because I never hear thank you, either verbally or written!

Zephyr331 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

Great shower idea: If you are throwing a baby shower have the guests fill out their address on a thank you card envelope as they arive. Then use the envelopes for a prize raffle! Fun for the guests and all mom has to do is write the thank you notes, stamp them, and send them out.

chicklit828 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I know the whole having guests address an envelope has become popular, but really if you had to find their address to give to your hostess to send the invite, then it's not that hard to keep that list for writing thank yous. I personally think this trend is tacky, but to each her own. I personally enjoy taking an afternoon to kick back and write out all the thank yous! Best of luck to all of you with your new bundles of joy!!

jnolts |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I really hate the practice of having guests address their own letter. The hostesses of my bridal shower did that and half of the envelopes ended up wrinkled or used as coasters at some point. I redid all of them. Lately, my husband's and my rule for thank you notes is that if we receive a gift and open it in front of the gift giver(s), then we say thank you in person and no cards will get sent later. If someone sends a gift, or is part of a gift, but is not there when we open the gift, we either send a note, email, or make a phone call.

strumpet |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I am wondering if I can send typed thank you notes. I know that they are supposed to be hand written but I am having such terrible numbness and pain in my right hand that there is no way I can fathom writing 40+ thank you notes. I wrote two today for random things and I thought my hand was going to fall off. I am being thrown four showers and I think I am just going to make an announcement at each that I will be sending typed notes and apologize for the tackiness and explain why. I know that the only people that will really care are the older ladies so maybe I will hand write theirs.

hokiejennylynn |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

You have to give the hostess a list of names and addresses to send out invites. Why not address your thank yous in advance? If someone took the time to pick out and buy you a gift and attend your shower - the least you can do is write them a thank you car within a few weeks of receiving thier gift. I'm 8 weeks pregnant and have already received a few 'congrats' gifts. The thank yous are done and sent within a week. This way it doesn't become a huge chore. Sitting with a cup of tea and writing shower thank yous can be an enjoyable time. I agree with others - don't put that gift away until the thank you is done. And... food for thought - when we mostly get junk mail and bills after a hectic day - isn't it nice when someone writes us a letter or we receive a thank you card? Just pass along the courtesy and brighten someone's day.

hjhernandez |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I think the timing of thank you notes should be very forgiving of new moms and moms to be, as a mother of an 8mo old - I know! That said, I am starting a business to assist with thank you note giving: www.sanspen,com Sans Pen lets you build an address book - then create a guest list and store information about what guest gave you which gift. Then, you can write personalized notes to each person on your computer (selecting cool fonts that look like handwriting) whenever you get the chance. Then, we do all the labor of printing, stamping, stuffing, etc. I sent all my thank yous for my wedding and shower through the website and it was a life saver. If anyone uses Sans Pen (www.sanspen.com) I'd love feedback! PS you can send birth announcements too! :)

SansPen |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I'm never fan of addressing my own thank you envelope... Although some might think my preference to print out address labels instead of hand addressing the envelopes is impersonal also. I plan to get my thank yous out within 3 weeks of the the shower, 1 weeks for gifts at other times. It can be rather fun, who doesn't love real mail? Besides its a great opportunity to let people you know you appreciate and love them anyway, gift giving/receiving aside. Congratulations to all!

minikin83 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

It's always best to get thank you's sent as soon as you possibly can. That way they aren't hanging over your head and you can enjoy using what you've received. I like to think about who I'm sending thank you's to and how they could best receive my appreciation. My close friends and family (especially ones who live too far way to attend the shower or come see baby) would prefer a personalized thank you by email with attached photos of the shower or baby using their gift. However, little old ladies from church get a hand written card within a week or two.

AlliMcG |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I'm so glad to see I'm not the only one who was terrible about wedding thank you's!

confuegosuzy |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

At my baby shower I thanked everyone when they were in front of me after opening their gifts, and handed them a favor when they were leaving. I think that is sufficent. Why do I have to thank them again in a note? I figured I would just send out an announcement when the baby is here.

FOZZ606 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

When I give a gift, it is because I wanted to give the gift. If you expect something in return, it is not a gift. I realize that a thank you may not seem like you are asking for something in return, but you clearly are. I appreciate thank yous when I get them, but never hold it against someone if I do not.

shartung |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I like the idea above where you hand a favor as people leave your , just add a thank you note along with that and you don't have to worry about sending out so many.

Natacreatedartist |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I think a couple weeks is doable. I don't like the idea of having people address their own, i think it's tacky and it's not that hard to do. Thank you notes are a dying art, but i think they are very important. If People take time to shop and attend my shower, the very least i can do is thank them with a proper thank note.

aberger02 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

Mine were almost a month and half late because my MIL had my shower 1 week before I was due because she didn't want to postpone her vacation. I then went into early labor 4 days after so the thank-you's were not my top priority.

Megs131 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I had two showers and gifts trickling in over the course of several months. My goal was to get the thank yous out before baby was a month old. (about three months from the first shower) I didn't have anyone complain.

kaman1116 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I heard a great idea from a friend who had planned several baby showers. The first gift that the mom-to-be receives is NOT having to write thank you notes to the people at the shower. (Obviously if someone couldn't make it, you would still want to write them a note) But what a great idea for a busy mom or mom-to-be!

a.odell |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

My first shower was thrown for me by my sister-in-law and it was on a Sunday. I made sure to write and mail the thank-you's by Tuesday. I don't know one side of that family very well, its quite a large family and I didn't want to make a bad impression or seem lazy, rude, ungrateful, ect.... Most people are understanding but if your unsure do it as soon as possible because you probably haven't had the baby yet so you can't be too busy. It took me an hour. Oh yeah and don't write the same thing over & over again...it's very impersonal.

katelauderdale06 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I plan on sending my thank you notes out the week after the baby shower. I have a friend who got married and had a baby all within a year. Her baby is now a year old and she never sent thank you's for her wedding shower, wedding or baby shower. I think this is horribly rude. It's one of my pet peeves to not receive a thank you note, especially when everyone is strapped financially. It makes that person look spoiled and extremely ungrateful. It's just plain rude.

FutureFence |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I have always been told that a new bride has a month to send thank you's but if a new mommy doesn't get around to it that it's not the least bit impolite! As the gift sender, just understand that the couple is thankful for anything you gave for their new baby and they are too busy using it to write you! As a sender, however, it is always nice to recieve a thank you, even when it isn't necessary!

AlbyBeth |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

OK so I'm not trying to be nasty here (forgive me - having one of those cranky pregnant days), but I feel like people who get upset about not receiving a thank you note in a timely manner need to get a life. The only people I know who get all up in arms about the timing of their note are my MIL (who is a giant pain in the arse anyway) and the old ladies in my family who have way too much time on their hands. I know that you are supposed to send thank you notes, but I really think that there are bigger things going on in life than worrying about the timing of said notes. Maybe I'm different than everyone else, but I purposely tell my girlfriends not to feel like they need to send me a thank you note for shower gifts and wedding gifts. As someone who had 460 people at her wedding, I am well aware of the stress involved in getting those thank you notes done in a timely manner. I tell people that if they want to send me a thank you, feel free to just shoot me an email or a message on Facebook. No need to spend the time hand-writing a card and then paying postage on something that I will more than likely read quickly and then promptly recycle (sounds harsh, I know, but how long are you really supposed to keep a card/note before you get rid of it anyway?). I personally just don't care about receiving them too much. As someone else said earlier, I was happy to give the gift and don't necessarily expect anything in return.

katebquinn |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I completed my Thank You notes within 2 weeks... all 60 of them! I didn't open my shower gifts or work on the nursery until they were done. It was motivation to get them completed quickly. I also worked on 5-10 a day as soon as I got home from work.

lyndiry |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I asked my sister about the timeframe. I went to 3 showers in 2009 and received no thank you cards. My shower is tomorrow. My sister already put address labels on them. I just have to say Thank you for such and such gift, seal the envelope and mail it. She said I should send these cards out within 2 wks as well.

Valarie10711 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I am pretty good about sending thank yous. My hubby said he will help me do them if need be. But i am planning pn having my host help me the day after my shower. She will be spending the night with me since she lives so far away. So it be good for us girls to go through everything really good and double check it all and start setting up the nursery. Also we are doing the thank you cards then when we go through things again. Mine will be mailed out the same day. If you need to get your host to help you if it makes it less stressing.

awood2005 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I had my baby shower on a Saturday, and I spent Sunday sitting outside writing thank you notes. It was so much easier that way because quite a few people gave me bags full of stuff, so I wrote their notes as I went back through the bags. If I had put everything away then tried to write the thank yous, I probably wouldn't have been able to recall (even with notes) everything people gave me.

zuezy67 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

In my culture thank you cards wont cut it......people (especially the older folks)prefer phone calls or just verbally saying thank you....so i guess i have to make thank you notes for my American friends so im not seen as being rude.

yetty25 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

People expect thank you notes because it is about proper etiquette. These days we let things slide and get sloppy. Younger people are often okay with e-mail even. It's older generations who went to classes and were taught to do this that feel slighted if you do not.

jroth33470 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I tried to do mine as soon as possible b/c I wanted what they gave me to fresh on my mind. It doesn't feel made up or boring when I can still see the gift in my mind.

useurname |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I had my shower on a Sunday, addressed my envelopes on Monday, wrote and mailed the thank yous by Tuesday!

asarver66 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

For those of you that think that only old ladies care about thank you notes, not true. I am super generous when my friends and relatives have big life events. If I am invited to a wedding, shower, birthday party, etc. I ALWAYS bring or send a gift to show appreciation for them and the invite. In return though, I expect that this person send me a thank you note as a sign of our mutual respect for each other. Both of my parents died when I was really young and I was shuffled around my entire life so I have always felt so appreciative for everything I have received. The least I can do is put a couple of words into a card and mail it. It's the least that people could do for me. If my niece graduates from college and I send her a check and don't receive a thank you, it's noted and when she gets married, this will be taken into consideration, as I don't want to encourage ungratefulness. Just my two cents. I also have the rule that you can't use a gift until you have sent a thank you. Helps me get thank yous out on time and keep my house organized.

BelenaV |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I was an epic fail on my wedding thank you's (it took nearly a year!), so I'm determined not to repeat past mistakes! My CA family held a regional shower for us last Saturday, and I wrote all of my thank-yous by Tuesday and they were in the mail by Wednesday. I can't tell you what a relief it was to have them done and out! I was truly overwhelmed and thankful at the generosity of those at the shower, and I figured that actions speak louder than words. So even though I thanked them profusely in person at the shower, I figured a nearly instant thank you note would only underscore that. However, I was 29 weeks at the time of that shower. My second shower (in WA) isn't until I'm 36 weeks, so I'm hoping I have the energy to be as responsive. It will be a smaller shower, and I'm hopeful that will make it easier to get the notes out. One last thought, for those who think that thank you notes are antiquated or for "old ladies," they're really not. In the world of instant gratification (Twitter, text messages, etc), taking the time to hand-write a thank you note really shows your appreciation. I know when I select a shower gift, I'm spending way more time deciding what to get off the registry than it really takes to write and mail a note. Just my $0.02. :-)

LisaA02 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

@acrlyhed That's a great rule! For my bridal shower, my SIL put the envelopes on the table for everyone to address and they served as both raffle tickets for door prizes and the obvious. It made life so much easier! Also, don't feel guilty about asking someone to take notes for you as to who gave you what if you open the presents at the shower, because once the gift tag comes off, you have no clue!

lewilhelm |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

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elva197411 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

At my upcoming shower we plan to have guests address their own envelopes to make sending out my thank you's much easier. Then we put all the addressed envelopes in a bowl and draw 1-2 for door prizes. Easy and beneficial for all.

shadysladyWed98470 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I think that within a month is more than fine, but to be honest I am not sure how anyone can be so held up on a thank you note. As far as I am concerned, if you are going to bitch about when I get time to tell you thank you..don't give me anything!

LaurenandMike13 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

My baby shower was today and I plan on getting my notes out by the end of the week so i can get them out of the way because there are so many other things that i need to do.

charissem30 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

WOULD IT BE INAPPROPRIATE TO GIVE THANK YOU NOTES AT THE SHOWER WITH A LITTLE SOUVENIER

LDYER88 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

im handing out thank you notes at the baby shower with the favor LOL just to avoid the headache of mailing. i figured your all here might as well give em out. i will however mail out the thank you notes to those who mailed in their gifts and were un able to attend.

mellama7891 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I'm going to get started as soon as possible - who knows when you'll have time after baby is actually here

e.dejesus |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

Oh my goodness. All of you having your shower guests address their own thank yous, printing out generic cards, and taking years (!) to thank people who were kind enough to give of their time and hard-earned money (or never thanking them at all): get your act together. People who were kind enough to give you a gift deserve an individual note, addressed by you, and sent in a timely manner. How selfish and lazy can you be?

Redthe22nd |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I try to do thank you notes right away. Sometimes it can be tiring and boring to do, but those people did not have to give you anything and you should show your gratitude. I've given people gifts for weddings, bridal showers, and baby showers and have yet to receive a card. I am one of those people that get angry when I don't receive a card. Facebook and email thank you cards do NOT count! I always write my cards within the first day or two after the event and then I don't have to worry about them.

RebeccaY1 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I prefer to send out thank you cards right away, but that's just a personal thing. I think that as long as the cards are sent out within 6 months then you are okay. I'm still in shock that I know several people that never bothered to send out cards and their children are 5 and 6 years old now.

RebeccaY1 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I think 1-2weeks is appropriate.

Krisd75 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

It is best to get it over and done with as soon as possible. Some people get very judgmental about these things. It really doesn't matter, but to avoid hearing about it later, I say at least sending them out within 2 weeks is "acceptable"

ashleyorm |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

I plan on having my baby shower at 30 weeks. But my mother suggest that I send out the thank you notes along with the baby arrival announcement. Which will kill two birds with one stone.

twashington02 |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

The sooner Catering Bandung the better. Xoxo

AnnisaLala |

Q&A: Thank-you note timing?

My mother-in-law gave me thank you notes as part of my gift and told me she thought I should send them out withing a couple of days after the shower. I wanted to scream! I work full time, we're building a new house, selling our old house, packing up for the move, and getting ready for baby on top of being EXHAUSTED. Ludicrous!

smacc |