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Q&A: How many kids should we have?

We're debating trying to have another child... what should we think about when adding to the family?


We're debating trying to have another child... what should we think about when adding to the family?

The Bump Expert

Most important: No matter how much you prepare and discuss and analyze, things don't always go as planned. But, whatever happens, know that you'll learn to love whatever family you end up with. That said, here are a few things to think about as you consider another addition.

The Only Child
Stat: 17 percent of couples have just one.
Pro: Easier on the wallet (and easier to indulge just one child), and more one-on-one time.
Con: No siblings to bond with (or entertain each other when you just need a break). And, it can be psychologically distressing -- all your time and energy goes into that one child, which can pile on the pressure.

Two for Two
Stat: 35 percent of couples choose two.
Pro: The perfect 1950s sitcom standard. No worries about only-child or middle-child syndrome. Plus, you've already started raising one -- why waste the skill set?

The Fantastic Five
Stat: 20 percent of couples opt for three.
Pro: More help with household chores... and more support for each of your kids, now and far into the future.
Con: Middle-child syndrome (one parent bonds closest with one kids, one parent with another, and the last child feels left out) can be an issue. Space becomes a problem, and restaurant tables are hard to find.

Caravan of Kids
Stat: 15 percent of couples have four kids or more.
Pro: Older siblings can mentor younger ones. Higher probability of getting that coveted girl or boy.
Con: Tough to pay attention to this many... let alone pay. The average college education is over $100K -- you do the math. And, you and your partner are way outnumbered.

re: Q: How Many Kids?

My husband and I have a 10 year old, a 2 year old and a 1 year old and Ijust found out that I am pregnant again!  I am terrified!  Why?!  

coridunn |

re: Q: How many kids should we have?

My parents had 2. Me and my younger sister. I love my sister but I always wished I had more siblings for some reason. I guess because everyone else in my family had larger families. My mom has 2 sibs, my dad has 3 sibs, my uncle and aunt had 5 kids. So I want to have at least 3 kids. It might be more difficult but they always say "the more, the merrier"

pocketpixie28 |

Q&A: How many kids should we have?

I'm one of four girls and my husband has one brother. I want four because I loved growing up in a big family and my sisters and I ... we're always there for each other. And now that my husband has been around us for so long, he wants four also. We have one so ... we'll see!

simba baby |

Q&A: How many kids should we have?

1st i think you should think about how hard to take care of a baby .any way i want either twin girls ,twin boys or 1 girl. but its your dessison so

laninabonita08 |

Q&A: How many kids should we have?

lanina - wow. I've heard of "opportune" times to conceive a boy vs conceive a girl, but didn't realize we could custom order whether or not to get twins or a singleton! Please, please, before you have children, get to a point where you will be happy with *whatever* baby or babies you get! :)

PiscesFish |

Q&A: How many kids should we have?

My husband and I want to have about six kids. People would tell me I want that much because it was just me and my brother (my parents weren't able to have more). My husband is the youngest of six and he feels the same about having a family. All four of our parents came from families with 5 or 6 kids, I think the want of a large family has much to do with the experience that , not only you had, but also your parents' experiences. Another thing, with each passing generation, we become more selfish. We need a smart phone, we need SatNav in the van, we need a TV in our bedroom... All that makes having children more expensive because we sometimes don't want to give up what we could have if we didn't have children or we feel we need to give all those extra things to our children. Having a big family isn't for everyone regardless the reasoning behind it. I have two so far and I still want about six. Ask me again after I have had two more pregnancies and deliveries.

CurlyTexan |