you asked...

Q&A: How to find a birth mother?

My wife and I currently have an application with an agency for a domestic adoption of an infant. We have had this application in for almost four years and our profile was shown several times, but we have not been selected. We're getting tired of waiting, and are considering trying to adopt independently. Can you give us any advice with respect to advertising and searching for a birth mother?

Re: My wife and I currently have an application with an agency for a domestic adoption of an infant. We have had this application in for almost four years and our profile was shown several times, but we have not been selected. We're getting tired of waiting, and are considering trying to adopt independently. Can you give us any advice with respect to advertising and searching for a birth mother?

The Bump Expert

Well, I agree that four years with little action is asking too much. As you know, in most states you can adopt domestically through an agency or independently, often through an attorney or, in some states, a facilitator. There are several differences between an independent adoption and an agency adoption, and one of them is that usually, with independent adoptions, you will be required to actively seek an expectant woman that is considering making an adoption plan. Whomever you adopt through will give you specific ideas on how to “advertise” for expectant mothers, but it will probably include networking through your friends, family, place of worship, and doctors, and advertising in local newspapers and on the Internet. Because of the expenses people incur while searching, independent adoptions are often more expensive.

When I consult with people who have been waiting a long time--with minimal results--for a domestic adoption, I usually suggest that they look at what they’ve told their agency or attorney as far as risk factors, gender, or race. Often, there’s a low probability of finding a child that fits the profile that the couple is requesting. Sometimes adoptive parents are correct to stick with these restrictions, but sometimes they are just not well informed about what the risk factors mean. Another suggestion is to look at the information you prepared for prospective birth mothers. It could be that you need to rework it to better show yourselves off.

Since you would likely lose the money you already paid if you withdrew your application from this agency, I would suggest that you ask them specifically how many children they’ve placed each year in the last four years that meet the criteria you’ve requested. How many of these women saw your profile? How would they suggest you improve your profile? Also, read over your contract. Many agencies do not prohibit you from concurrently proceeding with an independent adoption. You also need to think through what you would do if two birth mothers selected you.

Dawn Davenport

re: Q: Finding a birth mother?

Don't do pre-birth matching. It's coercion. A woman isn't a birth mother until AFTER she has given birth. If you match up ahead of time she will feel obligated to give you her baby even if she changes her mind and wants to parent her child, which is in the best interest of the child.Why don't you look into adopting out of foster care? Those kids truly need homes. Infants need their mothers.

Mrs.SPT |

Q&A: How to find a birth mother?

You aren't limited to adopting through an agency or doing your own advertising. Advertising can be expensive and when individuals do it, it only lasts for a week or a month (newspapers or magazines) and then if you haven't found an appropriate birth mother, you have lost that money and are back to square one. Yellow page advertising lasts for a year and with a cumulative effort can benefit you either very quickly or over a period of time. Utilizing a reputable facilitator can be a good option. The money you spend on advertising is refundable through the federal tax refund whether you have a successful adoption or not, so you are not risking a lot. With a facilitator, your advertising money is pooled with that of multiple families (make sure that there is a limited number of families), so your money and that of others works for you. National advertising will benefit you more than localized advertising. There are not a lot of birth moms in any one place. At this point, the national birth rate is down and abortions are up, so it's harder to find a birth mother today than it was ten years ago. The more exposure you get and the better your profile is, the more likely you are to match. Also, the more open you are in regards to race, location, gender, and even age (perhaps under a year), the more likely you are to be able to be presented to more birth mothers. Good luck in your adoption search. Don't give up!

alaboroflove |

Q&A: How to find a birth mother?

Sometimes work is be yourself quotes wherein the quotes about death of a loved one plays a role too

laran21 |

Q&A: How to find a birth mother?

There are some attention-grabbing points in time on this article but I don?t know if I see all of them heart to heart. There may be some validity however I will take maintain opinion until I look into it further. Good article , thanks and we want more! Added to FeedBurner as properly. slots kostenlos spielen || bingo spielen kostenlos

amitrana |

Q&A: How to find a birth mother?

I am glad to found such useful post. I really increased my knowledge after read your post which will be beneficial for me. Triple Chance online spielen | Blazing Star Download

kumar9 |

Q&A: How to find a birth mother?

Your website is so cool. I'm impressed by the details that you have on this blog. It reveals how nicely you perceive this subject. Bookmarked this website page, will come back for extra articles. spielhalle | novoline online

kumar9 |

Q&A: How to find a birth mother?

I agree with you. This post is truly inspiring. I like your post and everything you share with us is current and very informative, Merkur Magie online | Merkur Magie 2

kumar9 |

Q&A: How to find a birth mother?

The key seems to generally be broadening your search. If you are open on race and gender and have a realistic budget (most situations we've seen average about $30k), there is no reason you should be waiting that long. Be careful with Facilitators, they are illegal in some states and we have found some to have predatory practices. A few of the large, nationwide agencies will allow you to register with little more than a hundred or two hundred dollar registration fee. To Mrs.SPT, who seems to think that couples seeking to adopt newborns are unjustly pressuring expectant mothers, you should not project your feelings onto others. Each woman must decide what is right for her and her child. If she chooses adoption, that is a beautiful choice. Sometimes a mother wants a different life for her child than the one she can provide. It is her right to make that decision.

brendj |

Q&A: How to find a birth mother?

Make sure to stay active with your profile. Make sure your profile paints an accurate picture of you. Write about what makes you unique. Stay away from all of the general statements about being the friendliest person you know. Use photos that illustrate your unique life. Create an online profile. Journal weekly.

daddyphelps |

Q&A: How to find a birth mother?

My name is Camille bruno Valdez my partner and I have been trying for a baby for over two years now, We were going to a fertility clinic for about 5 months before somebody told us to contact this spell caster who is so powerful, We contacted him at this email; arewaspecialistttemple@gmail.com , for him to help us, then we told him our problem, he told us that we will either conceive in February 2014 or March 2014,but after two years of trying we were at a point where we were willing to try anything. And I'm glad we came to Dr Dahiru, Because his pregnancy spell cast put us at ease, and I honestly believe him, and his gods really helped us as well, I am thankful for all he has done. contact him via email: arewaspecialistttemple@gmail.com if you are trying to get a baby or want your lover back. he has powers to do it, he has done mine,

camillebrunovaldez |